<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Charlie and the Ships Who Look Like Children by Inter_VersaLoli</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23153977">Charlie and the Ships Who Look Like Children</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inter_VersaLoli/pseuds/Inter_VersaLoli'>Inter_VersaLoli</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - All Media Types, 碧蓝航线 | Azur Lane (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Crack Crossover, Crossover, Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:20:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,686</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23153977</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inter_VersaLoli/pseuds/Inter_VersaLoli</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When the four adorable Starters of Azur Lane crash into Charlie Bucket's home, his life path is changed in a manner more irrevocable than any Golden Ticket.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Choco-Warp!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It was Valentine's Day, and our four lovely starters were making chocolates for the Commander, as was base tradition.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There were a great many tales as to how exactly this tradition came about. Some say it all started with a Kansen with an exceptionally great </span>
  <em>
    <span>love </span>
  </em>
  <span>for the commander (depending on who you ask, it was either Akagi or Taihou), but unimpressive chocolatiering skills.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Knowing she was hopeless with making sweets, this young woman in love decided to hold a grand competition to see which KANSEN could make the best chocolate, all in an effort to pool the baking talents of the entire base together, and snatch the cream-of-the-crop for herself as a gift to her beloved Shikikan. The winner would get all their chores done for them for an entire month. In the end, so the story goes, a ship from the Royal Maid Corps won that competition, but refused the award as a matter of personal pride.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Others say that the KANSEN were just sick and tired of the only sweet stuff available on-base being Oxy-Cola, and whatever small items the human personeel managed to smuggle past the gate guards (which were always gobbled up by the destroyers before anyone else). Thus, some enterprising souls tried to make their own sweet stuff (including chocolate, of course), and the practice spread to the other nation's dorms.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Whatever the reason, most of the Shipgirls on-base now used this day as an opportunity to show their affection and gratitude for that young commander who has led them safely through the most treacherous of battles, time and time again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>We're home</span>
  </em>
  <span>." said Laffey and Javelin from the door, the latter excitedly, the former sleepily. They each carried a plastic bag brimming with all sorts of supplies.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As they entered, Javelin offhandedly looked at one corner of the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey, I thought that new high-tech oven was gonna be installed today?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Akashi is going to come up in an hour to do it, yes." Ayanami answered.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Which is </span>
  <em>
    <span>why</span>
  </em>
  <span>…" Z23 grabbed the bag of groceries from Laffey (who had fallen asleep while standing up, much to Ayanami's awe). "We have to quickly and efficiently finish these chocolates. </span>
  <em>
    <span>No fooling around,</span>
  </em>
  <span> you three!" she said, wagging her finger like a beleaguered teacher, or perhaps a mother.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Now let's see what you bought…"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The short-haired blonde reached inside the plastic bag, and took out: A tin of cocoa powder, a tall carton of fresh milk, some eggs, a packet of salt, and a packet of sugar. Nimi nodded in approval.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Ah, thank goodness, at least you got the basic ingredients right."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey,</span>
  </em>
  <span> what do you take us for, anyway?" Javelin huffed, putting down her own bag on the kitchen counter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Now, what's this?" Nimi asked, pulling open Javelin's bag to reveal a stack of colourful volumes inside.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"They're cookbooks! I thought we might like to try a different recipe than the one we always used!" said Javelin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nimi shuffled through the books, looking over the titles as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"… Jamie Oliver? I never thought he made chocolates, too."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After shuffling through a few more titles, she put the whole stack on top of the counter with a big </span>
  <em>
    <span>thump</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, I guess I can allow it. We can use one recipe now, and save the rest as surprises for next year's Valentine's… Hold up, what </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>that?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Right there, at the very bottom of the bag, hidden until every other item was taken out, lay a volume that looked very out-of-place. Normally, cookbooks and bakebooks were big hardbacks with large glossy pages, all the better to showcase full-colour images of mouthwatering treats that </span>
  <em>
    <span>You Too Can Make, enterprising young chef!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This one, however, was a paperback nearly half as small in the width and height department. There were images inside, but many of them weren't of food.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Charlie and the Chocolate Factory</span>
  </em>
  <span>." Javelin read. She then flipped it over and read the back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"... Wait a minute, this isn't a cookbook, this is a </span>
  <em>
    <span>storybook</span>
  </em>
  <span>." she exclaimed. That was when Z23 cut in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Javelin, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>proper term</span>
  </em>
  <span> is </span>
  <em>
    <span>novel</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Though, yes, this seems quite unhelpful to the task at hand, even if it does have the word 'Chocolate' on the cover…" the Ironblood destroyer said, taking the book from Javelin and fingering through the contents.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Sorry… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Zzz… </span>
  </em>
  <span>Thought it was a cookbook…" Laffey tottered.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Seriously…" Nimi said, giving her own forehead a light massage with her fingers. "Laffey, we really have to deal with this narcolepsy problem of yours. And </span>
  <em>
    <span>soon,</span>
  </em>
  <span> before it leads to something you'll really regret. A mistake in shopping is one thing, making a mistake in the middle of battle is </span>
  <em>
    <span>quite</span>
  </em>
  <span> another."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I said I'm </span>
  <em>
    <span>sorrrryyy…</span>
  </em>
  <span>" said the bunny destroyer, her head now falling on top of the counter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey now, Nimi, why don't we go easy of Laff, okay? I know she's normally a sleepyhead, but she also had to do night patrols for the last few days, so we can't blame her for not feeling entirely up to it." Javelin said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nimi just sighed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I </span>
  <em>
    <span>still</span>
  </em>
  <span> think it's not just these last few days, but I guess I'll let it slide this time..."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She snapped her fingers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Jav, you and Ayanami get to heating the next batch of ingredients. Me and Laffey'll finish up with this current bowl."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her tone of voice made Javelin and Ayanami salute her on instinct.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Aye aye</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Captain!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As they ran off, Z23 sighed, and glanced back at the little novel.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Ah well</span>
  </em>
  <span>, it'd be such a waste to throw away such a new and untouched book, so I guess I'll keep this. Besides, I haven't read </span>
  <em>
    <span>this one </span>
  </em>
  <span>before." she said, with a little giggle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was certainly something very appealing in having a book all to yourself, that you knew you would be free to read and reference at your own pace without the looming deadline of a library book.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Laffey pouted. "</span>
  <em>
    <span>I</span>
  </em>
  <span> bought that book…"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Yes</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but the money you used to buy it came from </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> paycheck. And as far as I can remember, I gave you the money to buy ingredients and other stuff to help with chocolate-making, </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> novels."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh, </span>
  <em>
    <span>alright…</span>
  </em>
  <span>" Laffey huffed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At that point, Nimi decided to place the book on the high shelf. You don't want to get such a perfectly good book all mucked up with stains, after all. At that thought, the Iron Blood destroyer </span>
  <em>
    <span>shuddered</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Oh, the horror stories she could tell you, of the library books she found with thoroughly mysterious blemishes, in various shades of brown, yellow, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>green</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It frequently kept her up at night.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She pulled a stool to her side of the kitchen, before stepping on top of it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"..."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, as she was tip-toeing, she heard a shout from the other side of the kitchen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Nimi!</span>
  </em>
  <span> The pot is giving off all sorts of </span>
  <em>
    <span>weird fumes!</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>What!?</span>
  </em>
  <span> You girls, I leave you alone for </span>
  <em>
    <span>five seconds</span>
  </em>
  <span>…"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Thus, she leapt out of the chair and bounded over to the problem: A pot giving off smells that shouldn't ever be associated with chocolate.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Mein gott!</span>
  </em>
  <span> What in the world happened here!?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, in her rush, Nimi didn't completely finish putting that book on the shelf. And a book only half-placed on a shelf was a very precarious thing indeed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The book was ever-so-slightly more off the shelf than on it. Thus, the laws of gravitation took their natural course.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>*</span>
  <em>
    <span>Whop!</span>
  </em>
  <span>*</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nimi felt a surge of horror flow through her, as she heard a </span>
  <em>
    <span>squelch</span>
  </em>
  <span> behind. Slowly, she turned her whole body around, her brain slowly registering the information her eyes were receiving.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yes, the book fell into the mixing bowl. It's lower half was submerged in viscous chocolate.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"... That looks nasty, yes." Ayanami said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then, something even weirder happened.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For the first few seconds, the book, the chocolate mix, and the bowl itself were now </span>
  <em>
    <span>sparkling</span>
  </em>
  <span>, like the surface of the ocean on a sunny day.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was a crackle of electricity, and out of thin air, a tiny black sphere appeared above the mixing bowl.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then, some of the chocolate rose, as if sucked up by some invisible force, and entered the sphere.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The ball became bigger. Golfball-sized this time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>More chocolate entered the sphere, and it became even bigger, and bigger, and bigger, sucking in exponentially more chocolate as it did so, like a greedy child with a sweet tooth and a destiny of Type 2 diabetes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eventually, it sucked in all the chocolate in the bowl, and was now large enough that one of the girls could fit inside it while standing up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was an imposing sight. One could now also see within it the image of a factory of some kind, a stout building with smokestacks that reached high into the sky.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Arcs of electricity raced around the curvature of the sphere, and occasionally shot out into the kitchen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It hovered over the kitchen counter, </span>
  <em>
    <span>menacingly.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The girls took a step back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Keep away,</span>
  </em>
  <span> girls. I don't like the look of that round… </span>
  <em>
    <span>thing</span>
  </em>
  <span>." Nimi said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a few moments, the girls were wary and cautious, as any good KANSEN should be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a few moments.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>heavenly</span>
  </em>
  <span> smell of chocolate suddenly washed over them all, at such richness and intensity that it can't possibly be coming from any of the chocolate </span>
  <em>
    <span>they've</span>
  </em>
  <span> made. Thus, there could only be one source…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"What </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> that?" Javelin asked, breathing in deeply. These new chocolatey fumes were rich and heavenly</span>
  <em>
    <span>,</span>
  </em>
  <span> not the burnt scent of death she and Ayanami just made.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It had a particularly strong effect on Ayanami.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Mmmmm</span>
  </em>
  <span>… </span>
  <em>
    <span>chocolate</span>
  </em>
  <span>…" she intoned, her eyes rolling back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Ah! A-Ayanami, wait! Ayanami, stop!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Seemingly in a trance, the Sakura destroyer stretched both of her hands towards the hovering sphere, that source of the heavenly fragrance, and walked towards it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey Aya, come back!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Running over to her, Nimi grabbed the back of Ayanami's collar, and attempted to pull her back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Turning around, Javelin thumped the back of Laffey's head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey Laffey, help us out here!"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The other two rushed behind Nimi, Javelin holding Nimi's waist, and Laffey holding Javelin's waist. Together, they </span>
  <em>
    <span>pulled</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The combined strength of three destroyers against one, had knocked all four of them to the floor.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nimi slowly sat up, a hand to her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Oww…</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a moment, all seemed to be well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"... Umm..."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then, they saw a thin trail, snaking through mid-air.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was a trail of burnt chocolate, levitating from the pot on the other side of the kitchen, right into the strange sphere.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Uh oh,</span>
  </em>
  <span> that doesn't look good." said Javelin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Mr. Big Floating Ball, I don't think you should eat that. It might cause indigestion, yes." said Ayanami.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But the warnings from the Sakura destroyer went unheeded. The unappetizing chocolate went into the sphere.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"..."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a moment, nothing happened. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then, great arcs of electricity were thrown around the room with even more power, pulling open drawers with metal handles to the floor, and throwing hanging utensils off their hooks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It also started to suck the girls in like a vacuum cleaner.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Aaah! Help us!</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Told you so, yes." Ayanami said, as she was holding on for dear life, her fingers pressing around the edges of one of the kitchen tiles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That was when the force of suction got even stronger.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was then, at that very moment, that Nimi felt the need to say that classic line, compulsively said around the multiverse whenever a particularly disorienting ride was incoming.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Everybody, </span>
  <em>
    <span>hang on!</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>All four girls were lifted off the ground, and spun like tornadoes as they were sucked into the strange sphere, the fabric of time and space contorting as they did so.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>*Whomp!*</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>*Crackle*</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>*Crackle*</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>*Crackle*</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>*</span>
  <em>
    <span>Creeeeeeeeeaaaaaakk</span>
  </em>
  <span>*</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The door to the kitchen opened. Coming in was a green-haired cat, dragging behind her a state-of-the-art oven on top of a dolly.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<span>I've been knocking for the past minute, </span>
  <em>
    <span>nya</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but nobody answered. Do you people want your oven or-</span>
  <em>
    <span>nya!? Nyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!</span>
  </em>
  <span>"</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>FYI, I'll be basing this primarily on the original Roald Dahl novel, with a smattering of Burton's 2005 film. I have never seen the version starring Gene Wilder, nor am I intending to. Of course, however, you are free to imagine the characters any way you see fit.</p><p>If any of you were wondering about how the hell I came up with this story, it's simple!</p><p>Just:<br/>-Make a list of all fictional universes you have at least a halfway familiarity with (separated by medium, using spaces)<br/>-Insert them in this list randomiser: https://www.random.org/lists/<br/>-See what kind of unexpected combinations (separated by spaces) the algorithm gives you, and see if any of them spark your imagination! (even if you don't follow the combination exactly)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Charlie's Daily Life</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Buckets were a family of seven, all living in a small wooden house at the edge of town.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The family consisted of one child, his two parents, and those parent's parents (also known as grandparents). There were four grandparents in the house, two grandparents for each medium-parent. There was Grandma Josephine and Grandpa Joe for Mr. Bucket, and Grandma Georgina and Grandpa George for Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Out of them all, Mr. Bucket was the only one with a job. This <em> was </em> the age before two-income households were the norm, after all. Even a man in a job as precarious and low-paying as "the one who puts on the caps of toothpaste tubes" was expected to support an entire family with it. Most of his salary was dedicated to sending Charlie to school, and what was left was barely enough to buy everyone food. They certainly couldn't afford another child.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Their house was also far too small, for a family so big. There was only one raised bed in the entire house, and it was occupied 24/7 by the four grandparents of the family. So old and weak they were, that they spent all their days and nights stuck in that single bed. All wearing pajamas, the elders went to bed one day, on the 8th of May, 1945, and never stepped off again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At least, not under their own power.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie and his parents had to make do with sleeping on bare mattresses on the floor. It was not so bad in the warmer months, but as winter came closer and closer, the breeze that swept through the floor of the house grew colder and colder, such that Charlie and his parents had to huddle together on a single mattress just to fall asleep.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But despite all this, they all loved each other very much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was a day seemingly like any other day. The day was overcast, the pigeons were flying and shitting everywhere they could without a care, and Charlie had to walk home by himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>All around him, his classmates paired off in groups of two, three, even four or five! But not Charlie. Never Charlie. When other classmates talked about the latest episode of The Avengers (no, not the one with superheroes, this was the Sixties), Charlie had no choice but to sit at the sidelines, or occasionally make stuff up when asked for his opinion, like "It was great!", "It was amazing", "David Keel is my favourite character!". When in reality, he'd never seen an episode of the show, had no idea what a David Keel was, because his home had no television.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie had almost nothing in common with his classmates. This was why everyday, when the last school bell of the day rang, he went home alone.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie knew the whole, zig-zagging route home by heart. Just around the corner from school, there was an entire row of little shops. They sold toys and sweets, pencils and paper. Classmates and schoolmates would frequently enter one or more of these shops after school.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not Charlie, though. Never Charlie. His only pencil for the moment was a tiny stump made by repeated sharpenings over a long period of time. He only got new pencils by asking his classmates to lend him a spare. The only reason they didn't mind was that they had dozens of the things already.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His parents tried so hard to insulate Charlie from the worries of poverty, but it was very hard <em> not </em> to think about money, when you and your parents slept on bare mattresses, had the same cheap watery broth every night, and could only afford to buy one bar of chocolate each year.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So if he could get something for free, Charlie thought, there was no point in spending money for it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie walked several more blocks, past several more shops, until his nose picked up a scent he knew very well, and he smiled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was, in Charlie's humble opinion, the most excellent scent in the world. It was the deep and rich scent of freshly-made <em> chocolate </em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Right in front of Charlie were the absolutely <em> towering </em> gates of Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory. This building was one of the only places on his route where he would still stop, and look on in wonder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was barely a year old when this grand old factory shut its gates to outsiders, but convinced his two Grandfathers to tell him the story.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>One day, tired of all the spies and saboteurs that other sweet-makers sent in to steal the secrets of his wonderful treats, Mr. Wonka fired every single one of his employees, and shut the gates to his factory forever more.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And yet, that did not mean the factory had closed down. <em> Far from it! </em> Not only did it produce more sweets than it had ever produced before, the factory had started producing a wider variety of sweets than ever before!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But there were still so many unanswered questions: Just <em> who </em> was helping to make all those sweets? Mr. Wonka certainly couldn't do it by himself, no matter how much of a genius he was. In fact, whatever became of Mr. Wonka? Ever since he kicked out all his workers and shut the gates himself, he has never once appeared in public ever again. No more interviews, and certainly no more photographs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Some people think he may not even be alive anymore!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His fingers grasping two black iron bars, Charlie peered into the courtyard just in front of the factory entrance.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was nobody guarding the gate. Not a single sentry, or even a dog. Big as the gates may be, Charlie could imagine that a determined person could scale them and drop onto the other side. Then, they could go in and see the chocolate, up-close and personal! They'd get to see how they were made!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And maybe… just maybe… if he was clever enough, and impressed whoever was inside, he might just get <em> free samples </em>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Free samples of <em> chocolate </em>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie quickly shook his head, and slapped his cheeks. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>No. He would have his chocolate soon. One month from now. A single bar, for his birthday. No more, no less. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>There wasn't any point in craving more than what you can get.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thus, he forced himself to walk away from the factory.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As he got nearer and nearer to his house, though, his pace gradually grew faster and faster, until he was all but running.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He slowed down once he got within sight of his house. His mum didn't appreciate people running here and there and everywhere with no good reason, and wouldn't hesitate to stick her head out of the window to let them know it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He opened the front door, and closed it behind him just as quick. He shot off greetings to both his mother and to all four of his grandparents, while also dumping his bag on top of his mattress, before rushing back to his grandparents' side as hurriedly as his tiny little legs could take him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grandpa Joe! Grandpa Joe!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em> Charlie, </em> what did I say about running in the house?" said Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I'm sorry, mum..." Charlie said. He then turned back to his Grandpa, with all the excitement of a hummingbird's wings.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grandpa Joe, Grandma Josephine, Grandpa George, Grandma Georgina, could you tell me a story? <em> Oh, </em> could you <em> please </em> tell me a story?" he asked, his hands pressing together so tightly that they were turning white.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandpa Joe seemed to think about it for a moment, before saying:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"How's schoolwork, Charlie my boy? You doing fine on that front? You don't need any help, do you?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Um... No, Grandpa Joe. I looked over all the work that Mr. Shelby gave us, I think I can handle it."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, if there's <em> anything </em>you need help with, dearie, you can always turn to us." Grandma Josephine said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"God knows, we hardly do anything else these days…" grumbled Grandpa George, though less at anybody in particular than at the world itself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What about that test you got last week, Charlie?" said Grandpa Joe. "Did they ever get back to you on that?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em> Grandpa, </em> they already returned the test to us <em> yesterday. </em> I got a <em> B </em>, remember?" said Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em> Ah yes </em>, that's right! You're a bright kid, Charlie. Why, when I was at school, I failed every arithmetic class I've ever taken! So much so that my mum and dad pulled me out and made me help out in the family farm!" Grandpa Joe laughed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The year just started, Charlie. Have you made any friends yet?" Grandma Georgina asked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"She has a point, Charlie. Friends are very important. You can't stay and talk with us old codgers forever. You need people your own age to relate to!" pressed Grandma Georgina.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh, but <em> Grandma, </em> nobody can tell stories as good as the four of you!" Charlie answered.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Nonsense!" said Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But it's true!" Charlie insisted. "So please oh <em> please oh please </em> tell me a story!" Charlie pleaded with all of his little heart.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh <em> alright </em> , <em> alright, </em> ya little rascal, I'll tell ya a story! Now, what do ya wanna hear?" asked Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This time, Charlie decided to ask him once more about that great and mysterious Chocolate Factory at the edge of town.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ah, <em> that </em> place? Is there a story surrounding that place we <em> haven't </em>told you about yet?" said Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandpa Josephine leaned over and whispered in her husband's ear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"… Hm, yes, that's right… <em> Alright then, </em> Charlie, how about this: </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once upon a time, there was a businessman with a great amount of money. More money than you or I could ever imagine! He was a <em> billionaire </em>. His name was Ripley V. M. W. Sparkle, an American."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Could've fooled me!" Grandpa George cut in.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"One day, he approached Mr. Wonka with a grand request, one that only the wealthiest could afford to ask for: A great big mansion where <em> everything </em> was made of Willy Wonka's signature rich, creamy, aromatic <em> chocolate </em>. And Mr. Wonka did it."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em> Everything </em>, Grandpa?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, everything except the bathrooms. But that still made up 99.9% of the house!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And, when he finally saw his 99.9% chocolate mansion, Mr. Wonka advised him to start eating it right away, perhaps with the help of a few hundred people. To which he responded:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>'You <em> limey egghead, </em> I'm not gonna just <em> eat </em> that work of art!! I am going to <em> live </em>in it!'"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"And <em> then </em> what happened, Grandpa?" Charlie said, leaning himself and his chair forward, until the only things holding him up were his sense of balance and the structural integrity of the chair's two front legs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandpa Joe clasped his hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, can't you guess?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"No, Grandpa. Please, tell me!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, from what I heard, the place was actually quite comfy during winter and spring. But once <em> summer </em> rolled around, the whole thing melted right on top of him!" </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grandpa, oh, you must simply tell me more details!" Charlie pleaded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Well </em>, I can only tell you what I read on the papers that day. But, the story goes, he was sleeping in one day when-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They all heard the front door swing open, then shut again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Guess what </em> , everyone?" said the newly-arrived Mr. Bucket. "For being such a hard worker, daddy got a <em> raise </em> . And you all know what <em> that </em>means!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"It means we get a taller house?" said Grandpa Joe, waggling his eyebrows.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh, you don't need to play dumb…" Mrs. Bucket said, stirring the pot swiftly. "Today's dinner is going to be <em> extra special </em> today!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Why mum? It's just cabbage soup again, isn't it?" said Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"It's cabbage soup…  with <em> carrots </em> and <em> potatoes! </em>" she answered, lifting the ladle and showing them all big fat slices of orange and yellow that Charlie had never seen unpeeled before..</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now, carrots and potatoes may seem perfectly pedestrian, even quite boring ingredients. But to the Buckets, who hardly ate anything but cabbage soup, cabbage soup, cabbage cabbage cabbage, this was a rare and exciting development.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After stirring the pot for a few more moments, Mrs. Bucket eagerly called out to her husband.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>George </em>, get the bowls ready!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie rushed in to help.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Big Mr. Bucket carried five bowls, all stacked up. Little Charlie carried two. They gingerly set out the bowls on the kitchen counter, one for each family member.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just as carefully, Mrs. Bucket scopped broth into each bowl until they were close to overflowing. She made sure to include an equal amount of carrot and potato in each bowl.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then, Mr. Bucket and Mrs. Bucket took each bowl, and handed them to the Grandparents first, one-by-one. They passed them slowly, almost reverently, being absolutely careful not to spill even one drop.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then, after each member of the family had received a bowl of carrot-and-potato-and-cabbage soup, they all gathered near each other.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Buckets were far too poor to afford even a proper dining table, so they had to make do with just chairs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once they all had their food in hand, and had settled down, they prayed their thanks for the food, then ate. The grandparents ate slowly and creakily, while Mr. and Mrs. Bucket ate at a more reasonable pace. Charlie, on the other hand, shoved broth and veggies into his waiting mouth. His stomach was gnawing a hole in his torso by now, and Charlie rushed to sooth it as soon as possible.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie was the first to finish.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And despite having imbibed a hearty meal of slightly less watery cabbage soup, Charlie was still, selfishly, hungry as hell. Making up his mind, he walked over to the cooking pot. But when he peeked inside, it was completely empty.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Oh, </em> I'm <em> terribly </em> sorry, dear. I should have made more…" said Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But dear, that was all we could get with what we could buy!" said Mr. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Yes </em>, but I should've added more water to the mix, at least…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh dearie, make the evening broth any more diluted, and we might as well be drinking hot water!" said Grandpa Georgina.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>No, no, </em>it's okay mum…" Charlie said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie sat back down at his chair, looked up at the lone lightbulb hanging from the ceiling, and desperately tried to think of anything <em> but </em> food.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He thought about his classmates, who talked about television shows constantly. They talked about Doctor Who, and The Avengers, and all sorts of other shows that aired on the telly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie wished he had a telly. Then, he could have an idea about what his classmates were talking about. Maybe he could even <em> join in </em>their discussions!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was bad enough that his classmates had pocket money to spend on the many shops set up just outside school limits: The toy shop, the sweets shop, the sporting goods shop, the other sweets shop, the stationary store...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Speaking of stationary, he <em> really </em> needed a new eraser. And Charlie didn't think his classmates would be as generous with their erasers as they would with their pencils...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>… and, there were still shops right after the street next to the school, right? What were they again?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The florist, the grocers, the post office, the butcher's, the antiques store...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>… Wait, what went after the antiques store?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Oh, that's right. The Chocolate Factory.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He remembered looking up at the high gates, imagining himself just climbing right over and getting inside, getting to see… to see for himself...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Oh dear, now he found himself thinking about chocolate. About delicious, creamy, mouth-filling <em> chocolate </em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie remembered the first time he'd ever had chocolate. He couldn't believe there could exist anything in the world as sweet and creamy and delicious as a bar of Willy Wonka's chocolate. He thought it was magic! It must be!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>All of a sudden, Charlie's bowl felt heavier. He looked down again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"My bowl is full again!" he shouted.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>My, my </em>, whatever could it be?" said Grandma Georgina.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"It's a mystery!" said Grandpa George.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"No, a miracle!" said Grandma Josephine.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Meanwhile, Grandpa Joe was cupping his bowl very conspicuously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This may have passed the attention of Charlie, but his mother was much more observant. She took one glance at the Grandpa Joe, and snapped out an order.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Show me your bowl, Dad."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a moment, Grandpa Joe hesitated. Then, he drew back his hands to reveal a completely empty bowl. Which was strange, because the Grandparents normally ate much more slowly than Charlie and his parents</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I was <em> especially </em> hungry today, dear. So much so that I shoveled in that food faster than you can say <em> cabbage! </em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A deep, rumbling sound rose up from his belly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mrs. Bucket continued to glare at him, absolutely furious.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Dad! </em>" she exclaimed, while Grandpa Joe looked slightly to the side, like a naughty schoolboy who'd just been caught fooling around in class</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a moment, Mrs. Bucket looked at her family. She looked at her husband, her two old and decrepit parents, her two equally-decrepit parents-in-law, and her son most of all. Innocent little Charlie. She sighed in frustration.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I know, I know, <em> I know </em> , there isn't <em> nearly </em> enough food for anyone. <em> Especially </em> a young and growing boy like Charlie. But I'm not letting <em> anyone </em> else in this family starve themselves just because of that." she said, and continued to fix Grandpa Joe with that glare.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandpa Joe just gave a wheezy little laugh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em> Agnes </em>, dear, I'm an old man now. Look at my hands…" he said, raising a bony appendage into the air. It was like a deflated blimp. All meat seemed to have shriveled away within the confines of his skin. The only things left were thin flesh, nearly translucent under the lightbulb's light, hanging for dear life on hollow bones.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He let them take in the sight for a few seconds, before they fell back on his lap, like puppets whose strings have been cut.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"D'ya think we didn't know how <em> useless </em> we are?" he calmly said. Mr. and Mrs. Bucket flinched, but said nothing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Looking at the younger generations, he smiled. Not a wide, bright, optimistic smile, like you would see when he was telling another one of his stories about far-off lands or far-off people, or of his madcap escapades and narrow escapes during the War.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>No, this smile was smaller. Tinged with just the slightest hint of sadness.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>We're just useless weight around this house, just lyin' here doing nothin' but snoozing all-day-long…" he said, with nods of agreement around him. "We rest on a bed poor Charlie could be sleepin' in, and we eat up food that's supposed to go to skinny little Charlie and his hardworking mother and father… Honestly, it'd be better if we weren't around at all..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie held Grandpa Joe's hand, and looked him in the eye. He turned and looked at the other Grandparents, his gaze shockingly fierce for such a young boy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grandpa Joe; Grandma Josephine; Grandpa George; Grandpa Georgina… you all are <em> not </em> useless." he stated. "You all tell me grand stories every night, and they make me <em> laugh </em> , and <em> cheer </em> , and get me all <em> excited </em>, and… you all make me feel less alone…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie suddenly tightened his grip on Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"So everybody, <em> please </em>. I don't want you to suffer just because of me." he said, and everyone who heard it knew he meant every syllable.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandpa Joe shot him a look that he knew very well. He knew it well because he saw lots of other people strike him the same look too. It was a look that was at once very proud, and deeply sad.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie did not understand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Aww, you little rascal!" Grandpa Joe said, splaying his arms about him. "C'mere!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And so, they did a great big family hug. Grandpa embraced Charlie from his spot on the bed. Grandma Josephine hugged Charlie from the other side, and the other two grandparents followed suit.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few seconds, Charlie's parents smiled, and moved in to join in the group hug.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And right in the very centre of the hug-pile, was little Charlie himself, who looked oh-so-small, next to all these big adults.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a brief moment, their hunger didn't exist. Nor did the holes in the roof and the walls, or the single bare lightbulb hanging up above, or Charlie's school, or Mr. Bucket's dreary job at the toothpaste factory, or the incoming winter, or the mysterious chocolate factory at the edge of town...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For the moment, it was just the Buckets, and their cozy wooden house.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a moment, there was peace.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then five girls fell from the sky. Going through the roof in the process.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was a great big <em> crash </em>, and a shower of wood flakes and wood dust rained on top of the Buckets. Five soft yet heavy impacts bounced off the top of their hug pile, with a feminine yelp each time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Nya! </em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Eep! </em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Yipes! </em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ouch."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ow."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a few seconds, nobody spoke.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then, Grandma Josephine screeched loudly enough that Charlie feared a window might burst. She jumped out of bed, and started hopping about the room in a mad panic.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ah! Ah! </em> " she yelled. "It's a bomb, a <em> bomb </em> I tell you! It's the War all over again! Hitler's invadin' the Isles! The bombs are dropping again! Quick, hide in the basement! Run out into the countryside! Get <em> out of here! </em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the Buckets were in quite a shock, as might well be expected, considering they lived the last two decades under the impression that the family grandparents' bones were so creaky, they'd break the moment any of them tried to stand up on their own again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Coming back to his senses, Mr. Bucket rushed over to his mother. "No bombs are being dropped, mum. <em> Please </em> , you <em> have </em>to calm down." Mr. Bucket said, doing his damndest to make himself heard without going into shouting fits as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Poor Grandma Jo, she never did really get over the war.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie was the second to snap out of their collective trance, shaking his head and looking around him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Scattered around the wooden floor were four of the most peculiar girls Charlie had ever seen in his life.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Granted, Charlie didn't have much experience with females his own age. He was already isolated enough in his own class, but the girls tended to form their own exclusive cliques, and were suspicious of boys who got too close. The only people of the opposite sex he was really familiar with were his mum and two grandmas.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Still, Charlie was sure it wasn't normal for girls his age to have white hair. Or purple hair. Or have horns on the top of their heads.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie looked back at his family.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mum, as well as the rest of his Grandparents, were totally still, as if still processing what in the world happened.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a moment, Charlie decided to do the sensible thing in this situation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He looked around the room and walked up to the closest of the strange girls that fell through their roof. This one had white hair, like an old person, but she looked only a few years older than little Charlie. She had her white hair done up in two voluminous pigtails, and wore on her head a headband with two long bunny ears sticking out of it. Loosely hanging from her arms and shoulders was a pink jacket, with a white undershirt clearly showing underneath.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She was lying on the wooden floor, eyes closed, clutching onto a bottle of... Cola?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm… are you alright?" Charlie asked.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Apologies for the wait. This chapter would have been even longer, but luckily for my sanity I decided to cut it into two chapters instead.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Confusion</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Umm… are you alright?" Charlie asked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girl just groaned, and rolled to her side.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>Oh no</em>, Charlie thought. She might've hit her head <em>really</em> hard and injured herself <em>inside</em>. What were they called again? Concussions? Weren't they supposed to be really serious?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Mum? How do you call the NHS?" he asked. The family only had one phone, stored in the kitchen cupboard's bottom drawer, given as a gift from some distant relative. Because of their money problems, this phone was only reserved for the most dire emergencies.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie thought this was as dire as they could come, barring the whole house burning down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His mother definitely concurred, given that she already had her ear to the phone at that very moment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The cacophonous ringing from the other side of the line continued, for the next few minutes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Moments after regaining consciousness, Ayanami quickly analyzed her situation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just before blacking out, she remembered them all being sucked into some strange spherical phenomenon that suddenly appeared in the base kitchen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Such bizarre phenomena could only be the work of the Sirens. That made Ayanami very upset.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Today was supposed to be special. She was new to the base. This was supposed to be her first Valentine's Day in Azur Lane, where they would teach her how to make chocolate, and they would all make enough of it to get the commander sick.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami questioned the usefulness of this goal, since part of the plan seemed to make the commander deliberately ill, but Javelin (who was the one to propose it) merely laughed it off. Well, they had their objective, and it was the duty of every good ship to reach their objectives <em>no matter what.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thus, those responsible for this will have to be <em>eliminated</em>. Painfully if need be. Not just to escape their captors, but to provide them a disincentive against trying such a stunt ever again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami intended to make it <em>very clear </em>the consequences of interrupting their Valentine's Day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She felt a presence approaching. Clearly one of the kidnappers, who had erroneously thought them knocked out. They were mistaken, but Ayanami could take advantage of this tactical error.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, we can't just leave them <em>lying</em> there!" Mr. Bucket exclaimed. He walked over to the nearest strange girl, who had Oriental features, and two metal "horns" extending from the top of her head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"C'mon Charlie, help me hoist them up to our mattre-*<em>hmmph!</em>*"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just as he was about to hold up Ayanami's head, she suddenly sprang up to her feet, and shoved her leg into Mr. Bucket's crotch, before she grabbed both his arms and flipped him over in a perfect Judo throw. Mr. Bucket slammed into the wooden flooring with a resounding <em>crash</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As pain flared, Mr Bucket also felt a foot go forcefully down on his ribcage, knocking the air out of his lungs, before feeling something very <em>cold</em> brush his face. Looking up, Mr. Bucket saw a metal contraption held right in front of him: Metal tubes connected to a raised base, that was itself mounted atop a contraption over the girl's shoulder that looked very much like a miniature warship's bow. From one side of the tiny bow, a metal handle extended out the side, firmly grasped by her left hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hearing her next words, he felt his blood chill.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Enemy attack."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Words spoken in a manner devoid of all emotion or affect, like a machine.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ayanami!</em> Stop! They're <em>civilians!</em> They're just human <em>civilians!</em>" yelled the voice of Z23. Ayanami looked to her side, and saw her rush over. The blonde put one hand on her shoulder, and clasped her other hand around the barrels of Ayanami's turrets, only seconds away from blowing poor Mr. Bucket's brain into chunks all over the floor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ni… Mi… ?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Aya, look around you. Do these people <em>look</em> like Sirens to you?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami turned away her weapon, and leapt several metres away from them. Charlie's jaw dropped when he saw that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Standing up straight, the girl from the Sakura Empire scanned the entire room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was a mainly wooden dwelling, with a bare lightbulb being the only source of light. Furnishings were surprisingly sparse. Even the most spartan of bunks back home had at least a table and a radio.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Scattered all around the place were her comrades. Z23 was right next to her, Javelin lay on the other side of the room, and Laffey was asleep against a wall.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There were also several humans. One child, two adults in their prime, and four adults of old age. A quick visual analysis showed her that they were likely frightened, and their bearings indicated no combat experience at all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Nimi was right, they were not Sirens.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As she let go of him, the woman rushed to the man she had planned to shoot, leaving the receiver of an old-style telephone sprawled across the floor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami immediately dismissed her rigging, and bowed to the family in the Sakuran style, keeping her hands to her sides while her torso bent forward until it was level with the wooden floor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I deeply apologise for attacking you." she said. "I had assumed you were enemy agents who had kidnapped us, and attacked without thinking."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Kidnapped!?</em>" yelped Mrs. Bucket. "But we've never even <em>met</em> you girls before!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girl who stopped her, one with short blonde hair and a black beret, stepped in front to bow as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We apologise for accidentally breaking your home, and we also apologise for the conduct of Ayanami here. Her social skills leave much to be desired, we know." said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The other two girls were finally stirring awake.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Uuuhh… where am I…" asked Javelin, holding her head as she sat up. Laffey was silent.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Actually... that's a very good question. May we ask: Where exactly <em>are</em> we?" Z23 asked, looking around her as if beholding her surroundings for the first time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You're in our house!" said Charlie, as if he'd been asked the most obvious question in the world.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Y-You and your friends are in the Bucket residence, dearies. In fact, may we ask where <em>you</em> girls are from?" asked Grandma Josephine, still reeling from what she had just seen: A young girl, barely older than Charlie, throwing a fully-grown man to the floor with seemingly little effort. So, she defaulted to her "Grandmotherly" persona when dealing with young children.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ah, well, we each came from a different country, but I suppose that wasn't what you were asking about, hehehe…" said the purple-haired girl, scratching the back of her head nervously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The blonde started, as if suddenly realising something.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Please pardon our rudeness!" she said. "We've suddenly appeared inside your house, and now we're questioning you without even introducing ourselves first! Let me introduce myself: I am Z23, proud destroyer of Ironblood."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ah! I'm HMS Javelin, from the Royal Navy. Pleasure to meet you folk!" said the purple-haired girl.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ayanami of the Sakura Empire, yes." said the beige-haired girl.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"USS... Laffey… Eagle Union…" said the white-haired girl, from her position on the floor. Her eyes were still solidly closed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The family didn't quite know where to begin, but it was Mrs. Bucket who spoke first. She turned to the girl who introduced herself as Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What do you mean… you're from the Royal Navy?''</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Huh? It means exactly what it means. Us Kansen always have a side that we fight for, and for <em>me,</em> I fight for the Royal Navy, as part of Azur Lane!" Javelin proudly stated, hands on her hips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Lass, I'm pretty sure the Royal Navy doesn't hire little girls." said Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Hire?" Javelin said, her eyebrows scrunching together. "I wasn't 'hired', I was <em>built</em>." she said, as if she were stating a fact as obvious as <em>the sun is hot</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Built!?" the Buckets exclaimed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm, <em>yeah</em>… ? Because I'm a <em>ship</em>?" said Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She raised a hand, and a flying swarm of tiny glowing cubes coalesced around it to form a metal turret contraption similar to Ayanami's. Mr. Bucket flinched when he saw that. Ignoring his reaction, Javelin held it up for the Buckets to see.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The whole family just blinked. They didn't know what to make of this feat. Actually, they didn't know what to make of <em>anything</em> that had happened since they first saw these girls.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Starvation? The cold? Having barely enough money to get through the day? Those things, at least, they knew how to handle.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Magical girls falling from the sky, though? They didn't even know where to begin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 looked at the dumbstruck family and sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I guess we've all convinced you quite enough. Now, excuse us."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The blonde turned to her fellow ships.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Come on, girls, we need to get moving!" she said, clapping her hands twice. "Laffey!" she snapped.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laffey sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But I was just about to get comfy here…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Still, she stood up and followed her friends, who were gathering at the door of the residence. Z23 spoke:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Alright</em>, girls, for the past few minutes I've been trying to broadcast an SOS. <em>No response,</em> as of yet. It seems whoever or whatever force dropped us here, has dropped us out-of-range of any friendly Azur Lane-affiliated forces."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Err… <em>Zed</em>?" Javelin said. "Nearly every civilised nation in the world is part of Azur Lane, especially since the Crimson Axis isn't a thing anymore."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"That's exactly what's worrying me so much. Whatever place they dropped us in must be <em>extremely</em> remote and inland, if we're getting <em>no</em> allied signals <em>at all.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>What!?</em> How in the world are we gonna get back to base, then?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Relax, this town must be connected to the outside world by some means, like a road. We will just find transportation to the nearest port town. No matter how small and insignificant this country is, there must be at least <em>some</em> Azur Lane presence in any settlement touching the sea. There <em>has</em> to be, with the Sirens being a constant threat to everyone."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Nimi, you've neglected one thing: We don't have any money." said Ayanami.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We can always hitchhike." said Laffey. "Did that a few times, back home in the Union."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I'm pretty sure hitchhiking is just an Eagle Union thing…" said Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 just sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"As much as it pains me to say it, we'll just have to improvise. Let's go, girls."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But as they were heading out, there was a loud <em>thump</em> on the house's wooden floor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Now <em>wait</em> just a gosh-darned <em>second!</em> I'm <em>not</em> settling for something half-arsed as this!" said an old, harsh voice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girls turned, and in front of them was one of the old men lying on the bed, now on his own two feet and advancing on them mercilessly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grandpa George?" said Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Did you <em>brats </em>think you'd just get away with a pretty little "sorry" before shuffling right out of our home like nothing happened!? Our <em>roof</em> is still broken, because of whatever tomfoolery you did! How're you going to answer for that, <em>hmm?</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We <em>promise</em> you, once we get back into contact with our superiors and explain our situation, they <em>will</em> compensate you for all property damage sustained." Z23 said to them. For good measure, she also bowed in the Sakuran style, her torso bending forward until it was level with the wooden floor. She had heard that such an act indicated humility. She hoped this would help get such a sentiment across to them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It wasn't enough, apparently, as another old person (a Grandma) barred their way, positioning herself between the girls and the door outside.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Now, while he could have phrased it a wee bit better, my brother-in-law has a point!" she said, in that voice both maternal and stern. "Now then, <em>where are your parents,</em> young ladies? You surely can't make up for the damage by yourselves, but I believe we can talk about it with your guardians."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ma'am, please get out of our way." Z23 said, politely, but with lessening warmth. Grandma Georgina frowned.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Now, young lady, is that <em>any way</em> to speak to your elders? Why, when I catch up to your parents, I am going to have to speak to them about your impudent behaviour!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Did you <em>not</em> understand what we just told you a few seconds earlier, <em>Ma'am!?</em>" Z23 said. Everyone, even her Kansen buddies, took one step away from her as she raised her voice. "We are <em>ships. Kansen.</em> We don't <em>have</em> any parents, or other legal guardians like that, because we are <em>not human</em>! And we have already told you, all property damage will be reimbursed by Azur Lane Command once they understand the situation."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Alright, that is <em>quite</em> enough of your make-believe now, young lady…" said Grandma Georgina, grabbing the blonde's arm.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>Ma'am.</em>" Z23 icily said. "Let go of me, or I will have to get violent."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suddenly, the tension in the room skyrocketed. Everyone else in the room (human and Kansen) looked on helplessly, as their strictest members refused to budge, and things careened towards a fight breaking out. The Kansen knew who would win, if that were ever to happen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suddenly, everyone heard a window swing open.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Nyaaa</em>… It's amusing seeing you all run around confused, but I got tired of that pretty quickly…" said a new voice from the window. Out of all the new girls Charlie had encountered in these last few minutes, this one was by far the most peculiar of them all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She was small (the smallest of them all, in fact), wearing a white dress with sleeves that seemed way too long for her. She had a head full of green hair, and on top of that hair was a pair of <em>cat ears</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They seemed to move and twitch like real ears, too.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>My name is <em>Akashi</em>, nya, repair ship of the Sakura Empire, but I'm guessing you people won't have any idea what I'm talking about." she said to the Bucket family, before turning to the Kansen girls.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Alright, girls, I want to make this very clear before we do anything else."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taking out a rolled-up newspaper, she tossed it to Z23, who caught it automatically.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We're currently stuck in another world, <em>nya.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Another world!?</em>" repeated the starter squad.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Capitalism Saves The Day, Nya</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"<em>Another world!?</em>" echoed the starter squad.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You mean, like a Mirror Sea?" said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami narrowed her eyes. "So we truly <em>were</em> kidnapped." she said, calling out her turret again. Grandpa Josephine yelped and dove under the bed frame, while the rest of the grandparents rolled off the bed to hide from the scary little girls with big cannons.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Wait, Mrs. Shopkeep, how on Earth did you figure that out?" Nimi prodded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I went out of the house and bought a newspaper, <em>nya</em>. Wasn't that complicated."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The… newspaper?" said Z23, opening the folded paper in her hands. She scanned through the articles, her eyes moving back-and-forth over the text.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Nya, <em>well?</em> Isn't it awfully strange?" Akashi said..</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Indeed, it <em>was </em>strange. At first, it seemed like an ordinary newspaper: <em>The Daily Mail</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 had never heard of <em>The Daily Mail</em>. She should've, given that the base library stocked the latest publications from newspapers around the world, and she was a frequent helper there!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But this could merely be an obscure rag. What couldn't be explained, was that none of the names of the great powers were used, even in the section titled "World News". There was no mention of Iron Blood, the Eagle Union, the Sakura Empire, or any other nation Z23 was familiar with. But the <em>cities</em> mentioned were familiar: Geneva, London, Tokyo, New York… just not their <em>countries</em>, which were now unfamiliar names like "Britain", "America", "China", etc. It made her scholarly head spin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>By the time she finished poking through the paper, she found her friends curiously looking over her shoulder (even Laffey). They looked just as confused as she was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You're convinced now, <em>nya?</em>" asked Akashi.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You're right, it <em>is</em> pretty weird. I find it hard to think of any other explanation." Z23 concurred.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin blinked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But why in the world would the Sirens want to remove <em>us?</em>" she asked. "We're just a bunch of Destroyers! If they could send a member of Azur Lane far away, without any hope of return, why not Ms. Enterprise, or Auntie Hood?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Meanwhile, back in the Azur Lane universe…</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Blue skies. No clouds. A perfect day for an outdoors tea party.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Several high-rankers of the Royal Navy sat around a daintily-decorated table, within the base garden. Specifically, a gazebo built in an isolated and secluded section of the base garden, a stone's throw from the Royal Navy dorms.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They were surrounded by Shipgirls of the Royal Maid Corps, waiting on their superiors hand-and-foot.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Usually, the Queen and her most powerful subjects would be sitting about this table, discussing things both idle and important with the same air of grace and serenity that the Royal Navy is so famed for. Now though, with the exception of Hood, everyone was hard-pressed to display that signature Royal Navy calm. The recent news hijacked their minds like an unwanted parasite.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The disappearance of Z23, Laffey, Javelin, and Ayanami had really put a damper on everyone's spirits. Search operations were still ongoing, but war does not stop for any random disappearance. The base had to juggle looking for it's four beloved starters, while also fighting the Sirens.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Akashi was also missing, but that was met less with worry and more relief. Shiranui certainly didn't seem that torn up over it, having taken over logistics duties most admirably.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Everyone was keeping their quiet, as they listened to Hood prattle on about this and that with the same cheer as she always did. God bless this battlecruiser. While much of the Royal Navy's elite were able to keep up the image of an elegant lady, Hood was one of the only ones for which it was natural. Other girls learned it by rote, but Hood was born in it, bred in it, lived it daily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Currently, she was detailing all the amusing things that had happened just last week, when Hood used her accumulated leave time to go shopping in the heart of London. Bismarck and a few other Ironblood Kansen asked to accompany her, leading to shenanigans.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"And when Bismarck heard <em>that,</em> she went and-... Oh dear."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the table looked on, as the Royal battlecruiser suddenly paused mid-sentence and looked down at her cup of loose-leaf Earl-Grey tea. For a brief moment, her face was utterly blank.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Is something the matter, Hood?" Prince of Wales asked, slightly worried.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Hmm, I don't quite rightly know, Wales… This might seem quite sudden, I know, but I just had this immense urge to grab a destroyer and horribly murder her by tearing out her spinal cord..." she said, as if she were discussing the weather. "Honestly, I don't rightly know what came over me at that moment. It is certainly odd, don't you think?" she said, sipping her tea, before sharing more stories about her and Bismarck's adventures in retail halieutics.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the table just looked at her with newfound terror. Meanwhile, the maids standing nearby started to pace <em>very</em> slowly away from her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Maybe their disappearance really is getting to her after all...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Perhaps they want to take us as hostages?" Ayanami ventured.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"If <em>that's</em> the case, then I stand by my earlier point: Why <em>us?</em>" Javelin wailed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Indeed, there are <em>dozens</em> of more powerful and important people in Azur Lane that would make better bargaining material than <em>us</em> measly destroyers… Umm, no offense, girls." said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"None taken. Maybe we're the only ones they could snatch at a moment's notice?" said Laffey, as awake as she could ever possibly be, now sitting on one of the only armchairs in the entire house, (an old, rotting thing covered with flaking leather). She chugged her cola like water.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Laff,</em> this is the <em>Sirens</em> we're talking about here. They can jam and unjam communications en-masse, send Kansen to other dimensions and sic their own doppelgangers at them, wield tech we barely understand… You really think they couldn't just kidnap Frau Bismarck, or Frau Nagato, if they truly wanted to?" said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suddenly, they noticed Javelin breathing heavily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Javelin?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Oh my God…</em>" she breathed. "What if we <em>never</em> get back! What if we… What if we…-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The purplette felt a comforting hand on her shoulder. Laffey.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"No point in wasting energy fretting about unknown things. Deal with each issue as they come. Save your strength for when you really need it." she said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ahh... geez, thanks, Laffey." said Javelin, scratching the back of her head. "I guess I was running myself ragged back there for no reason, huh… ?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 stared at the two of them for a moment, surprised at this sudden outpouring of wisdom from the base sleepyhead. She shook her head, and opened her mouth to speak-</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Only to be interrupted by the sound of a throat being cleared. The shipgirls turned around and saw Mr. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ahem. </em>While I have no doubt that what you're discussing is <em>very</em> interesting and all, I believe all of you have forgotten a more <em>pressing </em>issue? <em>Namely:</em> How are you girls going to answer for the damage to our roof?" he said, crossing his arms and trying to sound as authoritative as he can. He wasn't convincing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girls looked at each other.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, can't really vouch for Azur Lane to repay them if there <em>is</em> no Azur Lane in this world, <em>nya…</em>" Akashi said, deep in thought.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laffey has since fallen asleep in the armchair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few more seconds of thought, the green-haired cat began to (of all things) <em>smile.</em> The repair ship walked up to the breadwinner of the Bucket family and his wife, an extremely confident (almost smug) grin plastered on her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yes, <em>of course</em>, dear sir! I <em>do</em> so very apologise for the childish attitudes of my comrades, <em>nya~</em> Yes, yes, while we cannot afford to tally here too long, we also acknowledge the quite frankly <em>terrible</em> damage done to your property by us<em>.</em> But <em>worry not,</em> Sir and Ma'am! Within <em>seven days</em>, I can <em>guarantee</em> that you will have the cost of the roof <em>entirely</em> compensated for. In fact, <em>nya</em>, we'll repay you <em>many</em> times that! I daresay, enough to change your lives <em>forever…</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was a twinkle in her eyes as she said this, one that the destroyer girls recognised. It was the smile of someone who saw an opportunity to make even more profit than before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But… how?" asked Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>To that, the catgirl merely tutted while patting them on the leg (for she was far too short to pat them on the shoulder). "No need to worry your pretty little heads over <em>how,</em> Sirs and Ma'ams, just rest assured that <em>I have a plan…</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She then turned to the Destroyers, and winked. Z23 didn't know what to think</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>One Week Later</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was a new shop in town. It was a General Store (meaning it sold a little bit of everything) located near the less-well-off side of town.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Normally, competitors would dismiss this establishment as some third-rate mom-and-pop that could only make a decent profit on the wrong side of the tracks. They <em>would</em>, except for all the astounding tales coming out of that part of town recently.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For one thing, this store carried all sorts of fantastical goods that one would be hard-pressed to find anywhere else: Disposable cups of hard pasta noodles that could be softened to edible form with boiling water; handheld electronic amusement machines utilizing dot-matrix displays (that could also double as watches, fancy that!); comics for children <em>and </em>adults; Instant curry; a man-sized amusement machine offering a virtual game of ping-ping for ten pennies; wafer sticks coated in chocolate; and even Wonka's Chocolate Bars themselves!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But what was most intriguing about that shop, were these multi-coloured metal boxes called "Loot Boxes". From the outside, they might've looked fancy, but not anything particularly useful. But, like Christmas gifts, what mattered was <em>inside</em> the packaging. And <em>what</em> was contained inside, you may ask? Why, nearly <em>anything</em>: Snacks, toys, books, electronic amusements, and other assorted sundry items. The more expensive the item, the more rarely it would show up in any given Loot Box. You could open up a dozen of these things, and still end up with the same old bag of peanuts and tin soldiers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>But...</em> a real treasure <em>could</em> be hiding in any of these little toy boxes. And since they cost less than a pound each, what's stopping you from buying dozens? Hundreds?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And <em>why not? </em>If you get <em>lucky,</em> you <em>might</em> get a fancy new radio, or a speedy remote-controlled toy biplane, or a tub full of Willy Wonka's Everlasting Ice-Cream, all for less money than you would spend buying them "normally". And that made many people spend their hard-earned money in a reckless fervour never quite seen before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It's owner was also equally confounding: A short, green-haired Oriental lady who claimed she "Just had a condition, <em>nya.</em>", and who regularly manned the front desk of her store for it's first week of business. Her visage burnt itself into the minds of the store's first patrons.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Mr. Bucket worked for Akashi now. She said that employers who would pay an employee so lowly clearly did not value him highly. So, she just gave him a better option.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Last time anyone heard, Mr. Bucket's old role of "Toothpaste Cap-Screwer" was filled as soon as he had left it, which only confirmed how replaceable Mr. Bucket was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Akashi didn't care. That was just the way Capitalism worked. Businesses always put profit first. Thus, anyone who got employed by one needed to look after themselves, for their bosses certainly won't. Not unless they could somehow twist it to earn even more profit.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The four destroyers, for the most part, were completely dumbfounded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It had only been a week since they all first fell into this strange world with no Kansen or Sirens, and in that time Akashi (a foreigner to this land, with scant valuables and no connections) had managed to set up a moderately successful business in this town. Not only that, she had managed to rope in the very same people whose roof they broke, into becoming her employees!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 couldn't even begin to wrap her head around it. When she asked Akashi, she just smiled at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Let's just say, we Repair Ships have learnt to be a <em>very </em>resourceful bunch, <em>nya</em>."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The Obligatory Exposition Dump</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The bells by the entrance clamoured, as the front door to Akashi's Store slammed open.</p><p> </p><p>Before Akashi could decide whether to welcome them warmly, or scold them for potentially damaging her store, Javelin strode forward and slammed a hand on top of the counter.</p><p> </p><p>"<em>Akashi!</em> We understand if it takes you a while to engineer a solution. That's <em>fine.</em> What's <em>not so fine,</em> is that you've been telling us <em>nothing </em>about how you're doing on the matter! How are we gonna do it? How far along is it? Do you need any <em>help?</em> But <em>nothing meaningful </em>in the seven days we girls have been <em>stuck</em> here.</p><p> </p><p>You've only said: <em>I'm working on it, nya.</em></p><p> </p><p>That's the same thing you've been tellin' us <em>yesterday,</em> and the day before that! How do we know you're not just pulling our leg here, <em>hmm?</em>" said a clearly frustrated Javelin.</p><p> </p><p>Akashi blinked.</p><p> </p><p>For the past week, our four adorable Starters were holed up in a cramped room, right above Akashi's shop.</p><p> </p><p>At first, they luxuriated in having basically no responsibilities at the moment, their way home thwarted by an immeasurable gap between universes. Only by relying on the cleverness of one of their own could they stand even the slightest chance of going home.</p><p> </p><p>Still, a few days without modern conveniences would torment anybody. After two days, the lack of Internet access put a damper on the destroyers' stay here. After five, they were starting to miss not having to share a single bathroom between them all.</p><p> </p><p>"Javelin-san, Akashi makes her home in the same world as the rest of us. She isn't just doing it altruistically. If she did not find a way home, she herself would also never see the Sakura Empire ever again. There is no logical reason why she would not try to bring us home, given that she benefits as well." Ayanami reasoned.</p><p> </p><p>"<em>I don't know,</em> Aya, I believe you're putting too much faith in your fellow country-ship." said Z23, who had a pair of smart-looking glasses on. "Not everyone views their home nation so fondly, and she's already shown herself to be an unscrupulous ship, more concerned with making a tidy profit than fully helping the war effort, as evidenced by all of her absurd schemes and prices. Who's to say she'd actually rather <em>prefer</em> it here, having a new business without so many people familiar with her conniving ways…"</p><p> </p><p>"Zed has a point, you know!" said Javelin.</p><p> </p><p>"But still…" Ayanami demurred.</p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile, Laffey had found the mostly-empty top shelf of one wall to be an excellent place to nap.</p><p> </p><p>"Y'know, talking about someone in front of them is rather <em>rude,</em> nya…" said Akashi, who was annoyed at these destroyers obstructing her counter.</p><p> </p><p>"... *<em>sigh</em>* Alright, <em>alright,</em> I get it. You have no idea what's going on, and you're antsy. I get it. I'd feel the same if I were in your place." Akashi said, slipping off her seat. "Alright, I think it was about time to show you what I've been doing these past few days. You know, besides running a business. You girls just wait over there…"</p><p> </p><p>She went into the store's backroom, and came out again, this time holding a chaotic contraption that she could barely hold with both hands.</p><p> </p><p>The destroyers leant over the counter.</p><p> </p><p>If any of them had looked behind at that moment, they would have spotted the top half of a very familiar face, peeking right around the corner of a shelf...</p><p> </p><p>But they didn't, instead focusing all their attention on the contraption in Akashi's hands.</p><p> </p><p>It was composed of a Wisdom Cube, glowing with mysterious light, surrounded by what looked like the claws of some biomechanical monster. A harness made of steel cable connected the Wisdom Cube to each wicked-looking finger, tipped by blade-like claws.</p><p> </p><p>At the base of the claw's hand, there was a small length of chitinous forearm, dotted here-and there with an unsettling purple light, before terminating in a metal cylinder with buttons and switches lining one side. The other side contained a fold-out LCD screen, showing a variety of data that went right over the Destroyers' heads.</p><p> </p><p>"If you were wondering where the hell I was these last few days, here's your answer." she said, unceremoniously dropping the device on top of the counter. "You see this whole store here? All the glitz and the merchandise? Just a cover. In fact, more than half my time and profits were spent on <em>this</em> bad boy…" she said, lifting up the strange-looking device to the light.</p><p> </p><p>"But… what <em>is</em> it?" Javelin asked.</p><p> </p><p>Looking at the Wisdom Cube in the middle, Z23 mused. She snapped her fingers. "This has something to do with the <em>Kansen summoning process,</em> isn't it?"</p><p> </p><p>Akashi nodded. "Yep, you really are the brains of your group. The basic gist of this thing is, it's supposed to hijack the basic mechanism of the Wisdom Cube: Which is to pull in energy from other 3D planes of existence, <em>nya.</em>"</p><p> </p><p>The Starter Squad was quiet for a moment, their DD minds trying their best to process this esoteric information.</p><p> </p><p>"... Wait a minute, isn't the basic function of a Wisdom Cube to collect the Thoughts and Feelings the people have towards a certain ship, and manifest them into physical form? That's what we all learned in the Academy, at least." said Z23.</p><p> </p><p>Akashi snorted.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, <em>and?</em> By themselves, "Thoughts" and "Feelings" are just patterns of neurons in the brain, and bodily signals triggered by the release of various hormones in response to stimuli. They're not matter or energy in any way, shape, or form. To claim that Kansen could be created from patterns alone is as absurd as saying one can construct a building with nothing but the blueprints. It doesn't quite work that way, I'm afraid.</p><p> </p><p>For instance, bringing something as complex as a Kansen into the world would obviously require an immense amount of energy. However, researchers have closely monitored the environment of the summoning chamber over hundreds of summons, and background energy levels have always stayed constant every time a new Kansen appears. Heat. Light. Electric current. Literally as many different kinds of radiation as they could think of. Nothing. Even matter remained unchanged.</p><p> </p><p>If matter disappeared in the summoning, it could at least explain how it could fuel the process, as even the smallest grains of matter could be converted into an immense amount of energy. In fact, such conversion is the cornerstone of nuclear power, from nuclear power plants to nuclear bombs, <em>nya.</em></p><p> </p><p>But no. Even Wisdom Cubes do not go away. Scans have shown that Wisdom Cubes remain in the core of a Kansen, acting as her "keel", per se. They act as our anchors to the physical world. Otherwise, we would likely only exist for a fraction of a second before the energy making up our bodies disperses into the surroundings, and our patterns of thought and emotion rapidly descend into entropy-induced chaos.</p><p> </p><p>So, there are really only two possibilities, <em>nya:</em> Either I disregard all the Laws of Thermodynamics, or I have to consider that the Wisdom Cube is drawing energy via the fourth-dimensional plane or even higher…" she said.</p><p> </p><p>"Umm, fourth dimension?" said Javelin.</p><p> </p><p>"Just think of it as a direction that isn't up-down, left-right, or forward-backward." said Z23.</p><p> </p><p>"Huh?"</p><p> </p><p>"And if you figure out how that works, you'll be able to hijack the process so that <em>we</em> can travel in the fourth-dimension as well, yes?" said Ayanami.</p><p> </p><p>"<em>Well, </em>it seems you're quite the smart cookie yourself, <em>nya.</em>"</p><p> </p><p>Ayanami shrugged. "I merely applied logic to the situation."</p><p> </p><p>"But <em>yes…</em>" Akashi said, relaxing in her seat. "I've already detected some gravitational distortions when manipulating the Wisdom Cube, <em>nya, </em>so that is a distinct possibility. Until then, just sit back, <em>relax,</em> and let reliable old Akashi handle this complex matter, <em>nya.</em>"</p><p> </p><p>"..."</p><p> </p><p>It was then that Z23 decided to broach the elephant in the room, the one everyone noticed the moment they saw the look of the device.</p><p> </p><p>"Akashi, I don't know if you've noticed, but certain parts of that device look an <em>awful</em> lot like Siren tech…"</p><p> </p><p>Akashi's face was only bemused. "That's because it <em>is</em> Siren tech. Hell, do you think normal human tech is enough to hijack the functionality of a Wisdom Cube like this?" she said, matter-of-factly.</p><p> </p><p>The counter shook, when Javelin slammed both hands on top of the counter.</p><p> </p><p>"You <em>what!?</em> You would use the tech that nearly destroyed your country, <em>and</em> caused friends to start shooting each other in a time when <em>everyone</em> needed to band together against the Sirens!? What is <em>wrong</em> with you!?" she yelled.</p><p> </p><p>Akashi was unfazed by her outburst, only looking somewhat annoyed.</p><p> </p><p>"Siren tech didn't destroy the Crimson Axis, <em>nya,</em> we were just stupid. When we got ahold of the tech and started to take it apart, we should've just kept it on the down-low, especially when it became clear that our allies were uneasy with using the tech themselves. We should have bid our time, until the other factions ran into a problem that was unbeatable with base Kansen and human tech, but that Siren tech could resolve easily. And with the way the Abyssals were throwing new types of units at us, it was only a matter of time until that opportunity arose…</p><p> </p><p>But <em>instead,</em> we decided to <em>worship</em> the damn technology, like a tribe of bottle-worshipping savages. And <em>then</em> we proceed to attack those who didn't cleave to our new religion, including long-time allies and trading partners!"</p><p> </p><p>The catgirl sighed and slumped back into her chair, now no longer paying attention to the starters, or her invention sitting on the counter.</p><p> </p><p>"You know, I think we <em>really</em> deserved to get our ass beaten for our foolishness…"</p><p> </p><p>For a few seconds, nobody spoke. Laffey yawned, and went back to her indefinite nap. And then Akashi spoke again.</p><p> </p><p>"So <em>yes,</em> I'm using Siren tech in our interdimensional-traveling device. You girls got a problem with that?"</p><p> </p><p>For a moment, the Starter Squad looked at each other.</p><p> </p><p>After the surrender of the Crimson Axis, many loud voices wanted a ban on the study and incorporation of Siren technology. Their arguments did not make much practical sense, being based around ideas of purity and principle rather than increasing the raw probability of human survival.</p><p> </p><p>But for anyone even remotely familiar with humanity, it shouldn't come as a remote surprise that such arguments gained traction very quickly.</p><p> </p><p>Nonetheless, people with even half a brain could guess that research on reverse-engineering Siren-tech was still ongoing. The governments of Azur Lane didn't destroy the alien tech captured from the Crimsons, after all, merely hid them away for "safekeeping".</p><p> </p><p>"<em>Well,</em> this <em>is</em> a pretty desperate and unprecedented thing we're going through… I guess taking risks <em>is</em> warranted." Z23 conceded.</p><p> </p><p>Still, years-upon-years of fighting the Sirens, and those fanatical about their captured tech, has led many to be wary around such technology.</p><p> </p><p>"But… Are you <em>really sure</em> it's going to be safe? This <em>is</em> Siren technology we're talking about, after all." said Javelin.</p><p> </p><p>"Well, do <em>you</em> have any better ideas, Royal Navy girl? If you have, I'd <em>love</em> to hear it, <em>nya</em>."</p><p> </p><p>"Umm…"</p><p> </p><p>"<em>Besides</em>, aren't you being a bit <em>hypocritical?</em> After all, you're <em>friends</em> with a product of Siren-adapted technology. And I'd say her nation's engineers and scientists have done an excellent job. Ours were <em>shocked </em>when they saw the schematics of her and her sisters, back when the Crimson Axis was still a thing."</p><p> </p><p>Z23 examined her main gun, several tubes surrounded by jagged metal that resembled a shark teeth, a clear sign of Siren-tech integration.</p><p> </p><p>Javelin remained unsure.</p><p> </p><p>Laffey took another swig of her cola.</p><p> </p><p>"If you're still unsure, let me at least promise you this: Once we get back home, I can just chuck this thing in the warehouse and you can safely forget that this thing…"</p><p> </p><p>She held up the contraption.</p><p> </p><p>"... ever existed. You won't have to lay your eyes on this ever again. After all, it's highly unlikely we're ever going back here again."</p><p> </p><p>Suddenly, someone hit the shelves at the back of the store, causing several of Akashi's merchandise to fall to the floor.</p><p> </p><p>"<em>Hey, </em>who's messin' up my merchandise, <em>nya?</em>"</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Bitter Pill to Swallow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ever since those Ship-girls fell into his house, Charlie Bucket's life had changed in ways he'd never imagined before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Hey <em>Charlie,</em> wanna join our Rounders team!?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Charlie!</em> I'll snog you if you can get me one of those big-head dolls!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie, remember me!? We pretty much live in the same area, so why don't we walk together? And maybe on the way we can pass by <em>that</em> store, eh?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Hey, Charlie!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie let their requests slide off him. He knew his father was an honest man, not the type to give special favours to customers just because of a friendship with his son.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Besides, now was his father's day off, as mandated by Ms. Akashi. A <em>day off!</em> Such a thing was nearly inconceivable to Charlie's father, and Akashi had to point out how he could help his wife with the housework for him to even agree.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He walked out of the school gates, and down the road.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie was not enthusiastic about suddenly becoming one of the most popular children in his level. Others might eat it up, but Charlie would much rather stay back in the library for a reading spell, or rush home to hear his grandparents speak and tell tales</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was, however, one other thing. Something that Charlie valued above fame and fortune.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He no longer had to go hungry in school.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The gnawing pain he had to fight every class hour, which robbed him of concentration and peace of mind, was no longer there.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As far as he could remember, the pain was always a constant companion. The school's free lunches would take the edge off this pain, but after an hour or so, the hunger would return.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Like a background noise you never actively noticed until it suddenly stopped, Charlie had only realised it's presence when he started eating better, and it vanished for good.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie shamefully remembered that he has yet to thank Ms. Akashi, who's generosity had made all this possible. He vowed to rectify it immediately.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He headed home using the usual route, making a brief detour near the very end. Instead of going straight home, Charlie went the opposite direction from where his house was, along the same street.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This was considered the "lower-class" part of town. The Buckets were the poorest of them all, but most families here weren't swimming in money either. Many of them worked alongside his father in the local toothpaste factory, though none were in a position as lowly as his father was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At the very end of the street was the town's newest addition.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><b>AKASHI'S ITEM STORE</b>, it said on the front</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The interior looked just as flashy. The floor sparked, and the shelves looked like they could burst and spill their contents at any moment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie passed between a free-standing shelf, and the right-most wall. Strange merchandise surrounded him: Model kits of ships and robots, plush dolls of unfamiliar characters, snacks, even little televisions!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie was about to turn a corner, hands raising up to say hello, when he heard Javelin talking near the front.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Akashi!</em> We understand if it takes you a while to engineer a solution. That's <em>fine.</em> What's <em>not so fine,</em> is that you've been telling us <em>nothing </em>about how you're doing on the matter! How are we gonna do it? How far along is it? Do you need any <em>help?</em> But <em>nothing meaningful </em>in the seven days we girls have been <em>stuck</em> here!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>You've only said: <em>I'm working on it, nya.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>That's the same thing you've been tellin' us <em>yesterday,</em> and the day before that! How do we know you're not just pulling our leg here, <em>hmm?</em>" Javelin ranted.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wow, she… she sounded <em>angry.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>What could possibly have happened to wind her up like that? The Javelin Charlie knew was a very cheerful girl.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie's curiosity got the better of him, so he held off surprising them with a greeting, instead pressing up against the shelf separating him from them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ms. Akashi said a few more placatory words, then went to the back of the shop to rummage through the backrooms.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When she came back out again, she held… <em>something,</em> in her hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He peeked over the side of the shelf, just enough for him to see it. His eyes widened at the sight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was a strange, scary <em>thing</em> that Charlie was at a loss to even describe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>On the counter lay what looked like the claws of a monster, akin to the illustrations he found in some of the more foreboding library books, except these ones were <em>real.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>They weren't just lines of ink and splashes of paint, arranged cleverly to look like things not of this world. This was <em>real.</em> Charlie could see how light bounced off it's chitinous scales, how strange purple patterns pulsated from various parts of it like open wounds.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie felt it might lunge at them any moment now, and crush their throats.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The claws held a cube glowing with a gentle blue light, it's serenity in contrast with the monstrous appendage holding it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At the base of the claw's forearm, was a metal sleeve of some kind. Folding out was a kind of tiny flat television showing all sorts of info.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He then overheard Ms. Akashi spout a bunch of complicated stuff, with big words that he didn't fully understand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After some more exchange of words, he heard Javelin slam her hands on the counter and scold Akashi again. They argued over things that flew over Charlie's head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He <em>did</em> understand one thing, though: Javelin did <em>not</em> like that strange, scary device on the counter. She thought it bode nothing but bad news. Looking at it, Charlie was inclined to agree with her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was, however, the next few lines that hit young Charlie the hardest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Don't worry, you won't have to lay your eyes on this ever again. After all, it's highly unlikely we're ever going back here again."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Highly unlikely we're ever going back here again.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Unlikely we're ever going back here again.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>We're never going back here again.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>We're never going back.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie felt his stomach turn upside-down, like the feeling you get when you break someone's window by accident, but nobody is around to see it (yet). The same kind of feeling when you write an angry piece of mail to someone very important, and throw it into the post box before coming to your senses.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He felt <em>dread</em> gather in the pit of his stomach.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He may not know a lot of things, but Charlie did know this: Once they leave, it's all over for his family. They owed them <em>that</em> much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie may be young and poor, but he was certainly not stupid. Charlie didn't know a whole lot about anywhere other than his tiny town, let alone another world, but he recognised that the girls were very far from home, and wanted nothing more than to go back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie could sympathise. If he found himself hopelessly lost, wandering a strange street without a single familiar landmark, Charlie would probably curl up in a ball and cry (quietly, as he shouldn't cause other people trouble).</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But the Ship-girls were also the reason his family were as well-off as they were now. From an early age, Charlie knew the importance of money far more than his peers at school. If they left…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>If they left...</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie took several shuddering steps back, until his back hit a shelf, causing piles of merchandise to fall to the floor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Who's messin' up my merchandise, <em>nya?</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>If they left, father wouldn't be able to work in Akashi's Store anymore. That would mean he would have to go back to his factory job. Which means no more mashed potatoes and sausages every day. Which means no more full bellies. That gnawing, horrible hunger will return. Like a colony of rats slowly devouring his insides, gobbling up every scrap of flesh until he became more rat than boy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Most of the conversation was gibberish to him. However, Charlie did understand one thing: They were planning to leave as soon as possible. Whether it be a few days, or a few years, they'd made it clear that the moment a way back to their home was discovered, they'd <em>go</em> without any delay.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They're going to go away, and leave him and his family all alone again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>All of a sudden, memories of a life not too far off in the past came rushing back to him: Sleeping on bare mattresses on the floor, the December winds howling across the room like the walls weren't there at all; near-tasteless cabbage soup, every day, every single day; the utter desolation of school, having to keep the constant ache in his stomach from ruining his grades...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie felt his vision blur. Felt his eyes and nostrils dripping. He felt it. Cold, unrelenting. He made an undignified sound. He became dreadfully embarrassed at himself, at his useless sniveling.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"C-Charlie? Charlie, is that you?" said Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie heard her voice, but couldn't make himself give a response. He felt like he was suffocating.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie, what's wrong?" said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie felt two soft, lanky arms embrace him. He embraced her back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He sobbed. His mind was too full of things to speak, yet he managed to string some words together.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I just heard… You were talking… getting home somehow, and I wa-was thinking about wh-what would happen to me… to my family, i-if you all left..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh, <em>Charlie…</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At once, all four Destroyers pulled Charlie into a group hug. Charlie felt their warmth press in from all directions.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie felt a soft hand pat the top of his head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie, we won't <em>ever</em> leave you, or your family, alone. We promise…" said the purplette, affectionately rubbing the top of Charlie's head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>From the counter, Akashi spoke up:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Don't make promises you can't keep, <em>nya.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Akashi, just shut up." Javelin said, still holding him tightly along with the others.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And yet, they couldn't deny that she had a point.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Hold The Fort</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Two strangers strode through Azur Lane.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>One had her hair curled up in a tight bun, and wore perfectly circular spectacles. She was not a <em>Kansen,</em> though people have mistaken her for one. Her eyes faced starkly forward.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The other was her Aide, a newly-minted Lieutenant. He looked around him with a muted sense of awe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Belfast was leading them along.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was a harshly sunny day, with the three of them walking under a small strip of shadow afforded to them by a sheltered path. In the band between ground and shelter, one could see the various buildings of the base in the distance: The school, the lecture hall, the mess hall, the Item Store, the surprisingly oft-used concert hall, Mamiya and Barge's dessert cafe, the base garden, and finally, that iconic anchor statue in the middle of it all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not many outsiders came inside the base, but these people were different. They were <em>Inspectors,</em> empowered by the Admiralty to go into every nook and cranny of a base and find any un-military tomfoolery going around.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Which was extremely unusual, Belfast thought. Command had never sent any Inspectors here before. In fact, with regards to Kansen bases, Command had been content to live-and-let-live. It's been this way for years.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>What changed?</em> Belfast pondered.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ostensibly, it was the Inspectors' duty to ensure that nobody was lazing around or making a waste of things while none were looking. However, Belfast doubted it would be anything other than an ineffectual show.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>Indeed,</em> she could get the fleet mothers to gather up every Kansen on the base, tell them to clean up their dorm rooms, and then stand-by outside for inspection. But she knew it'd be futile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The moment they stepped out of sight, the parties, the drunken rampages, and the napping in inappropriate places will return, as Belfast knows it will. She's seen it happen too many times to count.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Still, orders were orders, and proper decorum must be observed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>So, Belfast made it today's mission to be the good host.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Akashi's Store</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Well, more like Shiranui's Store nowadays. She did admirably maintaining the store in her absence. The floor was still shining, and the shelves still fully stocked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Welcome to the Item Store, Ma'ams." said Shiranui.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Aide looked about him in sheer curiosity. Even the Inspector eyed a few of the displays.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... This is your PX? Isn't all of this merchandise a bit… much?" she said, carefully walking around an elaborate LEGO model of an Essex-class carrier.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We always have a high demand for our products, especially our fashionable clothing lines. So we always endeavour to keep a sizable stock of our wares. Disappointing our customers <em>too</em> much is bad for business."</p>
<p><br/>"What I <em>mean to say</em> is... well... this is all a bit ostentatious, don't you think?" said the Inspector. "For example, why would <em>anyone</em> here want to buy… hunting equipment?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Minneapolis-san has a great interest in hunting in the manner of the Native Indigenies of the Eagle Union. When she can, she'll spend whole weeks in the forest. She tends to prefer making her own tools and tents, but sometimes she's strapped for time and needs some pre-made equipment… or her sisters want to join in on her hunts." Shiranui shrugged.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ms. Inspector spent a few moments digesting her words, before she sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Fine.</em> However, just because it is <em>legal, </em>doesn't mean I wouldn't note it down…" she said, rapidly scribbling in her clipboard.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Excuse me, Inspectors, but while you're already here, may I interest you in our new line of automated digi-clipboards?" Shiranui prodded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>No,</em> thank you." said the Inspector. "I'm not here to go shopping."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Dorm</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This room's name was more properly the <em>Base Recreation Room</em>, but enough drunk and/or lazy Kansen have fallen asleep here that it has become the <em>de facto </em>base dorm for those too lazy to find their way to their actual quarters.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>On the other side of the <em>Recreation Room</em> was a sinfully massive bed, probably dragged in on Elizabeth's command.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>On top was a massive cuddle-pile, composed of mostly Destroyers, plus a cruiser or two.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Belfast felt her eyebrows twitch.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She had already informed everyone of the Inspectors' coming, and furthermore advised everyone to stay inside their <em>bloody</em> quarters for at least half an hour, but no, it seems <em>some</em> habits are far too hard to break. That, or they couldn't care less.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>However, the Inspector had her arms up over something else entirely.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Miss. Belfast." she said, and immediately the head maid turned to her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She was pointing at two cats being merrily chased around the room by a charging hog, all the while an eagle watched on, perched on top of a wooden chair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Belfast blinked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Please explain why there is a veritable <em>zoo </em>in here, Caretaker Belfast, including an uncaged bird, and a species that does not appear on the "allowed" list <em>at all.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At the Inspector's words, Grim cawed in annoyance at the foolish human. The hog did not notice her at all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Hey!</em>" cried a young voice. Ping Hai jumped in front of the Inspector. "<em>Xiao Xiu </em>didn't do anything wrong! Why are you being so mean to him!?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector rolled her eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Of course</em> it would be a ship from the Dragon Empery that would bring such a <em>repulsive </em>creature indoors. Now keep in mind, young lady, that the Admiralty is not so heartless as to disallow <em>all</em> pets. Cats? Certainly. Eagles? Perhaps. But <em>hogs?</em> That is <em>not</em> within the codex of allowed pet species at all." she said, waving about a small booklet like it meant something to the little destroyer. "<em>Who knows</em> what damage might be wrought by such an animal? Can they even really be tamed?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Of course he's <em>tamed.</em>" said the Destroyer, picking up the pig and showing it to her. "He only ruined the floor carpeting <em>once</em> this week. That's a new world record!" she said, grinning like she was expecting a head pat sometime soon.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector scowled instead. Ping Hai stepped back in surprise.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Why you little…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What the fuck is going on, brat?" said a new voice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ms. Jean,</em> this strange lady is being mean! She says <em>Xiao Xiu </em>isn't allowed on our base!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jean Bart looked between the pet pig, and the Inspector.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>Feh. </em>Like I always say, busybodies who stick their noses in other people's business deserve to be tied to the end of a cannon and shot." she spat, glaring at the Inspector like she was a pest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The former Vichiya battleship emitted a terrifying aura. Even a seasoned Kansen like Belfast would shudder if they were to bear the brunt of it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a normal human, it was downright suffocating.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... But that would take too long, so I'll settle for caving your smug face in." Jean said, pulling a fist back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Belfast sighed. With the four's disappearance, the base has become far more protective of it's smaller ships than ever before. There was now always an adult accompanying the young ones wherever they went, out of fear that more would disappear once they were out-of-sight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She probably needs to act before somebody gets court-martialed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ms. Jean Bart... </em>" the maid said, moving gracefully between her and the Inspector. "While your outrage is understandable, you wouldn't want the Admiral to get into trouble from one of his subordinates striking an official, would you not?" she reasoned.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>Bleh. </em>Figures a Limey would vouch for bowing one's head down like a good <em>fucking</em> dog." Jean sneered. "<em>Whatever.</em> Just get the hell out of here, your presence here is a goddamn distress to everyone else…" she said, gesturing to a gaggle of newly awakened little ships hiding behind her legs. Peeking out, they looked at the Inspector with unease.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector opened her mouth to object. Several turrets were shoved into her face. She didn't object anymore.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Azur Lane Academy for Young KANSEN</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The halls were deceptively quiet, but that was only because most classes for destroyers were held in the morning.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Primarily to hammer in good sleeping habits, as they <em>do</em> usually come with the mentality of children, after all." said the Head Teacher, Light Cruiser Köln. "So, do you have any questions, Inspector?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Actually, </em>yes. You've prattled on and on about your school, and how proud you were of all your students, but you have still not detailed what your curriculum <em>is, </em>exactly..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Well...</em> it's very hard to summarise, as we tend to tailor each ship's education based on individual aptitude and ability, as well as their interests, and their varying amounts of free time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>… But if you truly want an overview, every Kansen stationed here takes a course on basic naval tactics, on the tactical, strategic, and operational levels. Even if they aren't going to be seated in the Admiral's chair, it would still be helpful if the girls understood the reasoning behind their Admiral's orders, don't you think?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspectors nodded absent-mindedly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"In addition, some of them choose to learn a more general "Art of War and Strategy" from Ms. Amagi-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Wasn't she one of the Sakura Empire's top strategists and logisticians?" the Inspector hummed. "I did not realise we had such pedigree teaching in this base. Why has Azur Lane not loaned her out to other institutions, if it really is true that she is more of a thinker and strategist than a front-line combatant?" she prodded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Well...</em> many have tried to convince her, but she would rather stay here and spend time with her family."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Family?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yes...? Ms. Akagi, Ms. Kaga, Ms. Tosa, and little Akagi-chan as well."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... You mean that warped version of <em>Akagi</em> that resulted from a summoning accident? You still bother to keep her around? Interesting..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ahem...</em> In addition to military topics, we also hold lessons on general-purpose Arithmetic, Science, History, Literature, Geography, Home Economics, even a <em>Second Language </em>should they be so inclined!" she said, restrained but still audibly proud of what she had wrought.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... I see you try teaching them civilian subjects, in addition to military ones…" the Inspector noted. "... Could you please explain to me your reasoning for such redundancy? I don't see any reason why ships have to be taught things like science and literature…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Köln pursed her lips, and narrowed her eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"This war with the Sirens isn't going to last forever, you know?" she said. "And once the war's over, what do you think the Kansen are going to do for the rest of their lives? Dig ditches? Wait tables?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Serve the military." said the Inspector.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Truly? What if one of us wanted to <em>retire?</em> What could they do then? Or what if the Kansen wanted to switch to another career that <em>doesn't</em> involve fighting? What then? There's a young destroyer here with a keen interest in photography. Another, a battleship, is fond of baking and sweet-making. Surely you wouldn't keep them from pursuing their passions, wouldn't you?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... I am not against soldiers having interests outside of warfighting, but it shouldn't escalate to the point where it jeopardises combat effectiveness."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, fortunately for us, <em>no it doesn't.</em>" said teacher Köln, with a bit more bite to her voice than before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, as long as you're teaching them proper combat knowledge as well." she said. "Remember that you are running a school for <em>Kansen,</em> whose purpose is to fight threats to humanity. It would be unseemly if that aspect of their education were to be buried under a pile of superfluous fluff."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... I don't quite know what you think we are…" Köln said, with steel in her voice. "... but I'd like to believe that my students are <em>far more</em> than just <em>talking weapons.</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The two women glared at each other, with such ferocity that Belfast feared the surroundings might catch on fire. It's happened before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Fortunately, the Aide seemed to have found his testicles somewhere between here and then, for he cleared his throat loudly, causing both women to switch their glares to him. He turned to his boss.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>Ma'am,</em> I don't think arguing about it is going to solve anything. If we find fault with anything here, I suggest we just write it down and move on."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few seconds, the Inspector sighed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yes… Despite all of my… <em>personal misgivings,</em> I suppose nothing here is illegal or out-of-line with regulation, so I suppose I can give you a pass…" she said, scrawling on her clipboard like it was the Navy's constitution.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... <em>Charmed.</em>" said Köln.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Admiral's Office</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The moment the two Inspectors stepped inside, they were greeted by Sheffield, already standing by with a tray full of fine china.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Tea, Inspectors?" she said dully.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I take it that this base was satisfactory to you so far?" asked the Base Commander, one Admiral Daniel Keliʻi, over a cup of steaming Earl Grey tea.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector set down her teacup with a loud *<em>clink</em>*.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Reaching into her coat pocket, she plucked out an envelope with a distinctive logo in the centre seal. The official seal of the Azur Lane High Command.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She laid the envelope on the table.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Admiral broke the seal, and read the contents. He raised an eyebrow at the Inspector.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Let me cut to the chase, Admiral: You're wasting too much time and resources on a bunch of measly Destroyers."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Excuse me?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You've heard me, <em>Sir</em>. You've devoted far too much time and attention to finding a bunch of easily replaceable, low-level destroyers, with nothing to show for it at all. Not a single lead, or scrap of evidence, so now the High Command wants you to stop."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Admiral's grip on the letter grew imperceptibly tighter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"They want you getting back to your <em>proper</em> job as Admiral of the trans-national Azur Lane alliance, Hawaii branch."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... If they truly believe that, then the High Command must be either blind or stupid, for I <em>am</em> doing my job as Admiral. It is <em>my</em> duty, as their superior, to look out for the interests of the men and women under my command!" he said,dropping the letter on the table with an audible slap.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector sadly shook her head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Sir, </em>if I may speak freely: It is your duty as Admiral to best manage and utilise the resources that the Navy has given you authority over, to <em>protect the country.</em> Anything else must be as a means to this one end. The only reason concern over one's subordinates is prized, is because they'll fight harder and longer on the battlefield, knowing that their efforts will be appreciated. That is all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But <em>this?</em> Monopolising the time and efforts of half the research staff? Sending out whole battle groups on off-chances and wild goose chases? In fact, isn't this whole charade a bit out of your jurisdiction, Sir? This seems more like matter for the Military Police, than anything an Admiral needs to stick his nose into…" she drawled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I <em>have </em>informed MPs, and the local police." said the Admiral. "However, the circumstances are bizarre: It happened to a bunch of Kansen in the same location, in the middle of the base, in the middle of the day, and that was accompanied by unexplained damage to the surrounding area, along with trace readings of exotic energy. This leads me to believe that Siren activity was the cause. And I don't need to tell you why <em>that</em> is such a big deal." he said, sipping his tea as punctuation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Putting down his cup, he calmly steepled his hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Besides, the four of them are good girls. I doubt they would just <em>run away</em> or play truant like that. I could expect it of <em>certain other Kansen,</em> but <em>not</em> them. Thus, it would be insulting to suspect them of leaving on their own volition."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector's face was impassive.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But still, they are just <em>destroyers.</em> For every one of them lost, the Eagle Union can just pump out ten more. Even if your reasoning is correct, that cannot possibly justify the amount of resources spent in finding them. If anyone else was in your place, they would have already written them off as MIA, and refocused themselves on the bigger picture." she said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a few moments, the Admiral just stared at her. His face seemed to hold a thousand different emotions at once, unable to pick a single one to express.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Finally, he spoke.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>It seems,</em> Ms. Inspector, that we have different interpretations of what being a Commanding Officer means." he said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... It seems so."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He leant back, and spread his hands to the sides.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Inspector,</em> I don't know how you, or the High Command view the Kansen. But I view everyone under my command as <em>valued comrades.</em> No, even more than that. I view them as <em>Ohana.</em> Family.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And to me, I believe we should preserve more than just humanity itself. We should try to preserve human values, human <em>ideals</em>, as well. Things like <em>family,</em> and <em>comradeship,</em> and <em>belief in others...</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>… And I'm just saying: If we just gave up on our people, wrote them off as dead that easily, then we'd be no better than the Sirens, no?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Inspector's eyes narrowed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Grand ideals are all well and good, but in situations like this you'll have to pick a side eventually, Admiral. Either you're with the KANSEN…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her eyes flashed dangerously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... or you're with <em>humanity</em>." she ground out, her teeth snapping together like the chomping claws of a trash compactor.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Admiral looked at her for a few more seconds, before shaking his head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"That's the problem with you people, you know? You think everyone's either for you, or against you." he said, pulling up his teacup to take one final sip of his tea, before standing up."I will take your recommendations into consideration." he said, with a tone of voice indicating that he won't.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Sheff, would you be a dear and please show these guests out?" he said, without a second glance.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Living in a Society</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>That night, the evening newspaper was the talk of the town, Bucket family included.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As Mr. Bucket whipped out his reading glasses and read the latest headline out loud, Grandpa Joe grew more and more excited, his grin getting wider and wider until it threatened to split his face in two. Finally, when Mr. Bucket reached the last few words of the article, the spritely grandparent was about ready to burst out of the bed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Wowzers!" exclaimed Grandpa Joe. "The Good Sir Wonka's finally letting people inside! After so many years of being a mystery, we'll finally get some light shed on that riddle, wrapped in a puzzle box, stuck inside a labyrinth! We'll finally get some answers <em>at last!</em>" he said, pumping his fist.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Well, it's only <em>five</em> of those damn tickets, we shouldn't get our hopes up too high." said Grandpa George.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Grandma Josephine looked around. "Now just wait a fruity minute… where <em>is</em> Charlie?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now <em>that</em> question got the family talking.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Yes, Josephine is right, where <em>is</em> Charlie?" asked Grandma Georgina.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The last time I saw him, he was getting on with a serious case of the blues." said Grandpa George, nonchalantly. "Must be some boys at school giving him a hard time, or a troublesome girl. Or both. My guess is that he went off to some place we don't know, to be alone for a little while."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Oh, </em>where could he possibly be?" said Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Don't worry, </em>everyone. Charlie's a strong boy… He'll be alright." said Grandpa Joe.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 sat on the other side of the termite-ridden, rinky-dink table that took up the centre of their lodgings. She shot Javelin a harsh glare that made the purplette sweat, even under the air of an incoming December.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ayanami sat by one side, her mask of neutrality failing to hide the sheer worry underneath as she kept sneaking glances to both of them. The very first friends she had ever made.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laffey, meanwhile, was napping the day away in the corner like she didn't care.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The floors were bare concrete, and so were the walls and ceiling. The only source of light was a lone lightbulb, hanging from the ceiling from cords of bare wire.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The furniture was not much better. The mattresses had no frames, and so were laid on the floor. They were pock-marked with holes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The window frames were caked in rust, and it seemed only a Kansen was able to make them budge open.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>All-in-all, the girls were getting pretty sick of it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin liked to think that she'd thought deeply about her next words, but they still came out like an awkward stutter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I'm sorry… I thought… it <em>felt</em> right, so I-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The sound of Zed sighing cut her off.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Jav, </em>you know I love you, but… <em>grow up.</em> Just because it <em>feels</em> like the right thing to do, doesn't mean it <em>is</em> one. You have to think about the future, Jav. Or at least, think more than a few minutes ahead." she said. "Making promises like that would comfort him in the moment, but you're only going to hurt him later by setting up false hope. He'll just end up resenting us."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin flinched at that last statement.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 planted her hands on the table.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Alright, </em>here's what we're going to do: We're going, all of us (yes that includes <em>you too, </em>Laffey), to their household, look for Charlie, and clear up the confusion. We'll tell him: <em>No, there's no way we can choose to stay here</em> and <em>Yes, you and your folks will have to manage without us soon.</em> If the confusion has somehow spread to the rest of his family, then we'll have to clear things up with them as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And <em>you</em> talk to Charlie, Jav."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Me?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You were the one who said <em>that </em>to him, after all."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin just nodded, wearily slumping against the firm wooden backrest of her chair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I'm glad you have at least <em>some</em> sense, Javelin." said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laffey, newly awoken, took a swig of cola.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Stepping out of Akashi's shop and onto the street, they walked as a group down the sidewalk towards the Bucket house, getting some stares as they passed by.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For some time, Zed had been trying to get them to wear less conspicuous clothing, but they eventually decided that there would be no point in dressing to fit in, not with their... unconventional hair colours. So, they went in their usual threads (though Zed <em>was</em> convinced to keep her Iron Cross accessories pocketed for now. Apparently, people in this world don't have such a good view on the symbols of Iron Blood).</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At the very end of the lane, a block away from where a layperson would view as the edge of town, was the rickety Bucket house. It was set back a few dozen paces from the road.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They knocked on the door, and Mrs. Bucket graciously answered.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Why <em>hello</em> dearies, I don't think we've seen you around much at all! What's going on out there? Is everything all right there at the store? You know, that offer to come stay with us is still on."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"N-No thanks, Ma'am, we really don't want to burden you." Z23 said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We were just wondering where Charlie was. We wish to talk to him." Ayanami continued.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Oh,</em> little Charlie's went out, though he never said <em>where, </em>exactly<em>…</em>"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I see… Say, has… Charlie told you anything yet? Anything to do with us, or Akashi's Store?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh, not a single word, dear. Why? Is something wrong?" asked Mrs. Bucket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Nothing, Ma'am. Just checking."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girls walked away from the house, when Javelin suddenly took the lead. She then stopped in front of the group.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm… <em>Jav?</em> What is-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Girls, follow me. I'm pretty sure I know where he is." she said, striding off in some other direction.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Leading them, Javelin circled the Bucket's compound.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm, <em>Jav</em>, why are we going around the house…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Come on, </em>do you think that if Charlie wanted to be <em>alone,</em> he would go <em>into</em> town? But I know that Charlie wouldn't be the type to just go wandering into the wilderness on a whim either. So, the most likely place for him to be would be…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She stopped right next to a ladder, reaching all the way to the roof.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin put both hands on the ladder, and began to climb. After looking at each other, the other girls followed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They reached the top, and as Javelin popped her two legs unto the roof, she saw Charlie, sitting on top of the roof's precipice, watching the sunset. It's light turned the town into a beautifully stark silhouette.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He turned around, suddenly noticing the girls' intrusion.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm… <em>Hey.</em>" said Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Hello</em>." said Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Silence.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her eyebrows creasing, Z23 began to glare at her purple-haired friend. Wasn't she supposed to be the one good at talking?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But eventually, Javelin shook her head vigorously, as if throwing off something nasty that had started clinging to her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie… We have something very important to speak to you about." she said, with an admirable smoothness and amiability that the rest of her buddies could hardly manage, even on a good day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I-It's about you girls leaving, right? I'm sorry, I don't know <em>what </em>came over me back there. I'm <em>dreadfully</em> sorry, I was <em>rude</em>. I was awfully, <em>awfully </em>rude<em>. </em>I wa-was intending to surprise you guys, but then I overheard what you were talking about and I just… I just...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>… I mean, it was just <em>silly</em> of me to act like that anyway. Just because you passed by, doesn't mean you'll stay forever. So it's silly for me to throw a fit like that when I heard you were going away… "</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie drew away from the Shipgirls, like a puppy that's been slapped in the face one too many times.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Well, that was surprisingly easy. Come on Zee, let's go… " said Laffey, but Zed just shushed her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm, Charlie…. Do you know <em>why</em> we have to leave so urgently?" asked Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm… You miss your Mums and Dads?" Charlie guessed, to which Javelin only smiled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Charlie, we don't <em>have</em> parents, don't you remember? We're <em>ships.</em>" she said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh! Umm, I'm really sorr-"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But you're also right, though. We <em>do</em> miss our families." she said. "In fact, we miss a whole lot more people than just our sister ships…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We consider the entirety of Azur Lane as our extended family." Ayanami declared, locking eyes with Charlie as she did so.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He paused, and looked back at the girls.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He looked at them for nearly a minute, only blinking his eyes once.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You know... I never really got to know you, or where you came from…" he stated. "I'm... a lot of people actually… are still confused about you, about what you do, why you can do those things… Most girls I know don't carry around cannons, o-or crash through rooftops, or talk about scary and complicated stuff, or don't go to school at all…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Javelin scratched the back of her head. "Ehehehe, well, actually, we <em>do</em> go to school…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"R-Really? I didn't…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But the school you go to isn't really the same type of school that we <em>Kansen</em> go through."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh... I see... I know this'll sound silly and all, but to me you're all like <em>angels,</em> come out of nowhere to b-bless our family, or something…" he said, drawing even more into his jacket, newly bought by his mother from his father's increased paycheck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"A-A-And, d-don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for all the help. <em>Really,</em> I do! B-B-But I hardly know <em>anything</em> about any of you. The whole <em>town</em> barely knows anything about you! Akashi says you're all from another world, but no more... A-A-And I know it's silly and all… but not knowing stuff like this... it <em>scares </em>me…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Shipgirls looked at Charlie, then at each other.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The girls approached Charlie, and sat down, with Javelin right in front of him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Alright then…" she said. "You said you hardly knew anything about us, right? Well, where do we start?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Loompa-Copter was a miracle of chocolatineering, one whose use Willy Wonka reserved solely for himself, never patented.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was essentially a giant, hollowed-out gobstopper. Inside sat a specially-trained Oompa Loompa, and an array of blinking controls. The gobstopper itself was infused with significant quantities of minty menthol. The cool-headedness it gave the pilot (who, after some time jerking that joystick around, would feel an immense urge to lick it too), lifted the whole invention up, much like how a cool wind lifts one's spirits on a hot summer day. How refreshing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And lodged right in front of the thing, was a camera.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Did I neglect to mention that it was invisible? Because it was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For some time now, Wonka had been watching the boy, Charlie, from afar. Watching him and his family, but mostly him. He'd reach out and make tiny contributions to help his family survive just a little longer. He'd convinced those stuffy bigwigs <em>not</em> to fire the boy's father, despite the fact that automatic toothpaste-cap-screwers were among the hottest in the market. He also secretly blocked a planned demolition of the Bucket home for violating zoning laws.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A bit of help, but not so much as to lift him out of his misery entirely.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Why?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie, simply put, was the perfect heir to his empire. Curious, wide-eyed, and imaginative in all the best ways. But also destitute and hungry enough to realise the importance of good financial management, and giving him an attachment to luscious treats that a more well-fed boy would take for granted.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Finally, that family destitution could serve as a useful stick to pair with the lure that is becoming the heir of the Chocolate Factory.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But he'd been in a bit of a pickle lately. It just wasn't his day, these last few days. Every time he ordered the pilot to get closer and see what Charlie was up to nowadays, he always seemed to get some kind of interference.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something was very wrong that he did not know about, and it galled Willy Wonka. He laboured day and night to fix that damn interference problem, disregarding all reports from the outside. A new, shiny shop on their street? Bah, it's like any other Mom-and-Pop, stop wasting my time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"So you all <em>don't </em>have families, then?" Charlie said, frowning.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Oh <em>no no no.</em> Many of us <em>do</em> have sisters. I have lil' Juno and sleepy Jupiter. Adorable, the both of them" said Javelin, with cheer in her voice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I have Benson." said Laffey, in one of her vanishingly rare sober moments.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"I have so many sisters, you wouldn't even believe me if I told you…" Z23 said, straight-faced to the point of deadpan.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"And besides that, a lot of our… more mature comrades, our bigger battleships and aircraft carrier nee-sans, are almost like big sisters for all of us. The base is one big happy family." said Ayanami.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Also, to many of us, our Admiral feels almost like a… like a <em>father</em> to us..." said Javelin." I can't really say I've had any fathers before, but if I had one, he would look like Admiral Daniel."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Or a husband." Ayanami added. To which Zed and Javelin flushed deeply.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Ahem. </em>Javelin, his <em>proper title</em> is Rear Admiral Keli'li. It is completely inappropriate to address your CO by their first name." said Z23.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Aww, </em>but wasn't it an order from the Admiral to call him by his first name?" Javelin said, cheeks still pink.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ah… I-I suppose that is true…" Zed said in a rare moment of bashfulness, looking away with a flushed face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laffey took a sip of Cola.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Wow… You must really love everyone back in your world, don't you?" said Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Isn't it obvious?" Laffey quipped.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Umm, well…"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Yes, </em> you're right, we really do love them." Z23 said, moving to face nose-to-nose with Charlie. "Which is why you <em>must</em> understand why we must leave here as soon as possible."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Zed!</em>" yelled Javelin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"We have to rip off the band-aid <em>sometime, </em>Jav. This is not cruel, this is a mercy."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie didn't speak. He looked down and thought for a long time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... Take us with you." he said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... What?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"T-Take me and my family with you!" he said, standing up. "M-Me and my family's been struggling in this town for a long time, but things have never gotten any better! My father works his bones off at the factory, b-but we never had enough for more than a watery broth each day! B-Before you people came, I spent more time hungry than not. T-They don't know that I know, but I remember h-hearing my mom crying every night. I remember overhearing my Grandpas and Grandmas arguing whether it was a good thing that they were still alive and we had to take care of them! If… If you can't stay with us, at least let us come with you!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For a few moments, the boy stared at the Kansen. The Kansen stared right back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ridiculous." said Z23. It felt like a slap to Charlie's face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"The grass isn't always greener on the other side, Charlie. First off, even if Akashi allowed your family to come with us, what will they even <em>do</em> once there? Our world isn't like yours, Charlie. The factory jobs that your father did to provide for you have long since been automated. The pay Akashi gives him is actually extremely generous, as normally a retail job like the one he's currently doing doesn't pay nearly enough to support a family as large as yours.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>You and your family also don't have any records that are considered valid in our world. No citizenship papers, no birth certificates, no passports, no governmental record of any kind, no ID card, no <em>anything else</em> that a police officer on the street might ask you for. You can probably live like that for a while, maybe even get a job, but you won't be able to keep it up forever. And when the authorities finally find out about that, they might assume that you're criminals, or homeless, or even illegal immigrants! You can't just suddenly pluck your roots up and plant them in another <em>world.</em> That's not how the world works!" said Z23, her throat nearly rasping.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie didn't know what to say. He just sank down to the tin roof, and wrapped his arms around his tucked-in legs. Quietly, he started to rock.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"... I guess even the highest caliber guns aren't enough to pierce the structural oppression of poverty and borders…" said Laffey. Ayanami quirked an eyebrow.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few moments, Laffey sighed. She went over to Charlie, still rocking himself in a fetal position, and bopped him on the head. He looked up at her, startled. She grabbed his shoulders and turned to the rest of them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Come on losers, we're going to Akashi's place."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>***</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Akashi's Place</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You know you're going to have to pay me back for all this eventually, <em>nyaaa… </em>" Akashi said, putting down yet another oversized tray of sweetstuffs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The destroyers (plus Charlie), were in a brand new wing of Akashi's store, a sort of mini-cafe. Around them, students from around town chatted over fruit juice, milk and cola.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Despite this store being designed as nothing more than a side-project, a convenient money-maker while she was away from her main business back home, Akashi was nothing if not a shrewd and savvy businesswoman, and she'd pounce on any money-making opportunity that cropped up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Recently, the most popular items on the menu were various snacks and instant meals. Not surprising, considering such cheap, convenient food options like instant ramen and pasta would be all-but-unthinkable in these dark, dark times.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Of course, they were also unhealthy as all hell, but that was something only people in her home world knew. Let her customers savour the convenience, she would say, before people start having heart attacks and strokes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But enough of that. Now was a time for <em>sweets</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ice cream, chocolate, jellies, cakes…. Z23 had <em>no idea </em>how Laffey managed to get the cheapskate of Azur Lane to willingly give such a feast of desserts.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Another faint thought was that all of this sugar couldn't possibly be healthy for anyone. But looking at Charlie's exuberant face as he gobbled up more desserts in half an hour than he had ever had in his entire life, Zed felt like her worries were a bit silly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He's just a kid, after all. He can burn off those calories pretty easily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>One of the dessert types on the table was very special. It was a Willy Wonka-brand Super-Fudgilicious Chocolate Bar. The specific variety of Wonka bar that his family so meticulously saved up for him every year, and which he savoured for <em>days</em> after his birthday.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was just a whole pile of it there. Like, right there on the table, within easy grabbing distance of Charlie.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie's hands shook, as the two sides of his mind debated hotly with each other on how to react to suddenly having a <em>dozen</em> of those priceless bars in front of him. Should he take them all? Should he let his friends take one each?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His instinctive mind yelled the former, to snatch up those precious chocolate bars before anyone else could get to them! Meanwhile, his more socially-conscious side pressed for temperance. Charlie didn't know what to do.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Akashi, looking at Charlie's quivering state, scoffed freely.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"What are you putting yourself through such a headache for?" she admonished. "There's plenty more where that came from <em>nya.</em> It's just two pounds pence at a pop. Help yourself like nothing before!" she proclaimed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And with that, Charlie's Id picked up his socially-conscious side, and threw it over the edge of the ring. His wandering hands shot up and grabbed a whole handful of the chocolate bars at once.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He stared at them giddily, not quite knowing where to start first. Eventually, he just opened one at random. He peeled off the first wrapper like he was opening a Christmas gift. The first Christmas gift of the season. Then, with the sweet gold in front of him, Charlie took one savoured bite of it, then another, then another, then another, until it was very nearly finished. And then, he finished it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then he started with the next one. He opened the wrapper a little faster this time, a little more messily. And when the chocolate was finally revealed, he ate it up in fewer bites.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>For the third bar, he ripped off the wrapper in one smooth motion, and ate the whole thing in three big bites.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He grabbed another bar, and another, and on and on he went, to the point where even Akashi started to comment on his avarice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Hey, don't get diabetes, kid, that won't look good for your financial future." she told him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie paused.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"But nevermind that! That just means more money to extract from you later! So eat up!" she said, dropping another pile of chocolate on the table.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"..."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Charlie stared up at the summit of the pile, now looking very unsure.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Hey Akashi, stop pressuring him." Zed snapped. "C'mon girls, let's help him out."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She then took a chocolate bar out of the pile. Laffey did too. Ayanami generally didn't like chocolate. She was eating dango instead.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Z23 neatly opened the chocolate's wrapper, methodically teasing apart the individual folds that were glued together.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It was then that she noticed a strange shine coming from within the seemingly worthless wrapper.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"<em>Great Scott </em>girl! Let us see that!" yelled one bystander, who rushed into their table and held up her hand (and thus the wrapper) up closer to the light. It glinted even more brightly, and by now it was obvious what it was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A Golden Ticket.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Zed blinked.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>